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I felt the same way. But the physcogologist said not to do a food funeral or a food bucket list. She said why do that to yourself your just setting yourself up for failure; if you think you will never be able to eat certain foods again then you won't be able to. That's not what the band is about its about eating the same things as before just less of them. I know it sounds crazy to have to eat a steak or piece of chicken cut up like its for a toddler but isn't it better to do that with a great cut of steak then not have it at all. So I say no to the food bucket list.

Goodbye yummy Cookies and cakes. Goodbye fried foods and starchy potatoes and breads. Goodbye large portions. Goodbye eating late at night or just because someone offers it to you. For as far back as I can remember, food and I have had a love/hate relationship. Food has given me both comfort, misery and a waist that has constantly increased, decreased and increased again. I have battled over what to eat, how much to eat and when to eat. Food has made people judge me, laugh at me and stare at me for being the biggest person in the room. Food has made me feel bad after I would binge, and feel good when I knew I was doing the right things and making the right choices. So today this all ends! I am breaking up with my dysfunctional relationship with food! So to you bad food…listen up! I will no longer let you control my life. I will no longer make bad food choices that sabotage my long term weight loss success. I will no longer eat the bad food choices to make me feel good. I will no longer turn to food when I am stressed. I will no longer stock my kitchen cupboards with you. I want you out of my life for good! Moving on…hello good foods! Let me introduce myself to you. My name is Jen and you and I are going to be best friends. You are going to help me in more ways than you will ever know. You are going to be a form of nutrients that make me feel good about myself. You are going to help me loose weight and keep it off for good this time. You are going to keep me feeling strong and not sluggish. You are going to fill my cupboards and fridge with healthy choices. You are going to help me reach goals and finally do all the fun things I have sat on the sidelines watching for years. I will no longer let food control my life and have it be a permeate fixture over everything. I will no longer make bad food choices. I will no longer eat till it hurts. I will no longer let food dictate the choices I make. Social gatherings will not be centered around food…instead, they will be for spending time with those you care about, not what to eat or where to eat. As I get ready for surgery tomorrow, I have a mountain of emotions flooding over me. I am so beyond ready to make this change and create a better, healthier me! Sometimes you have to leave something behind…and for me, I have decided to leave bad food choices behind.

Sure, diet and exercise are easier. I've done it for years, and I've lost the same 20 pounds about a dozen times! Losing the weight is not the issue. It's keeping the weight off that is so hard. For me, banding was the end result of years of weight struggles, failing on every diet I ever tried, and realizing the clock was ticking. I'm not a young man, and how many more years of life would I have before chronic gross obesity finally killed me? Bandng was a fantastic option for me, and allowed me to finally get my weight under control. I will never look back, nor will I go back to being obese. Now, nearly a year after surgery, I've lost 125 pounds. I have had ZERO reflux, slippage, vomiting, hair loss, not enjoying alcohol, water not going down, or pills not going down. I've been stuck a few times, and each time it was because I ate wrong. If I pay attention and eat as a bandster should, I do not get stuck, and I can eat anything I want. I've had seven fills, the last three of which were very small, to tweak my "green zone" so my band works properly. Fills are no worse than getting a shot. It's a non-issue. Constipation is related to what I'm eating, and how much Fiber I'm taking in. My digestion has slowed down because of my diet, but it's another non-issue. I take fiber as part of my daily diet, and when it's time to visit the bathroom, there are no issues on that score. It's a small price to pay for being over a hundred pounds lighter. The decision you need to make is how many more years (and times) are you going to "get serious about diet?" If you could do it that way, you wouldn't be obese now, right? My honest advice is that if you have any doubts of being able to "get serious about diet," then have the surgery. If it doesn't work for you, then have it removed, and go back to chronic dieting. You have nothing to lose but your excess weight, right? Good luck! Dave

Final 15 pounds to goal!

a sexy man right about now would be a life saver

I thought I'd motivate myself to do some housecleaning by cranking up the tunes. My ITunes playlist entitled "Feel It Burn" was lifted from the kids next door & everything on it has an upbeat tempo. My favorite is Katy Perry's "Firework" -- it's a great exercise tune. Very uplifting. After emptying the dishwasher, I elected to make 6 cups of sugar-free Jello (I am on my pre-op liquid diet). The plastic container I traditionally use sprouted a leak and began spraying boiling hot liquid jello everywhere. Since Katy Perry's "Firework" was blaring I had been transported to a state of invincibility and it took me a few seconds to realize the bowl had the audacity to hemorrhage on a Super-hero like me. After salvaging about a cup of the liquid (will that stop up the kitchen drain?) I took an inventory of the damage. Spurts of red dye #40 had catapulted a good six feet from the kitchen sink. The floor looked like a crime scene. The counter-top wouldn't come clean -- it seemed to be permanently stained. By the time I tried to wipe the cabinetry, the jello had begun to gel. I don't know how b/c I had yet to add the cold Water. I guess the force of the wind cooled the spraying jello in mid-air? I also wiped fully formed jello from the inside of my glasses and sandals. Had I known making jello was a full contact sport I would have been more appropriately attired. Only minutes before, I had totally bought into Katy Perry's proclamation. I WAS a "firework"... destined for greatness. Mid-song, I was transformed from a firework to a f___-up & I made the appropriate substitutions in the lyrics as a I sang the song and cleaned up the mess. I hope the experience doesn't ruin the song for me. I LOVE that song.

Thanks, Amanda, but I'm thinking another blog would just be white noise. Hows about if I write anything else of any length on the forums, I'll post a pointer in my status update. That way, you'll have a head's up. Speaking of autocorrect, my little brother sent me an email warning me about post-op gas pain due to "Ina Rickey". Since I was scheduled for surgery the next day, I immediately googled "Ina Rickey" <-- sounded like an ugly condition, perhaps related to rickets (sp?). Turns out, he meant to say "inactivity" but he was bedevilled by spellcheck on his iPhone. I felt like a real idiot. :0) Thanks for looking in on me, friend. /P2P