I do understand the frustration! I was banded on Aug 13th, and lost about 10 lbs post op on liquids and mushy foods. Between my 1st fill in Sept and my 3rd in January I gained and lost the same 5 pounds. I was hungry all the time, and breaking down and snacking at night. I told myself that since I "could" eat 3 pieces of pizza that my band wasn't working and I kind of gave up a little. I didn't really gain, but I certainly wasn't making losing progress.
I knew as soon as I sipped Water after that last fill that it was different. I could FEEL the water sip slowly draining from my pouch. I hadn't felt that at all yet.
Also in the past month my fiancee found out his cholesterol was insanely high... so high and off the charts they couldn't calculate it. He's spent the past 8 months thinking he's been supportive of my diet needs, when he hasn't been at all. There was still snack food and junk food in the house. He was still ordering pizza and chinese food and getting ice cream multiple times weekly. Although I wasn't eating as much as I had before I was absolutely having little bits of all of that. I would tell myself the band wouldn't let me eat more than I should... I was deceiving myself. I knew that none of it was OK to have so often. a piece of Pizza once a month.. OK. 2 or 3 pieces of pizza a couple times a week... NO. He's also a big night time eater, and as I struggle the most after 7pm it was killing me. I'd be tired and what little willpower I had through the day had been eaten away. He'd want me to make something at 9 or 10 pm.. basically a 2nd dinner. So I was constantly around food and preparing food and eating food.
Now we're on a very strict diet and he's sticking to it. Bringing his cholesterol down is very important... his dad has had 2 heart attacks. As bad as this may sound, his bad cholesterol has been great for me! He isn't bringing junk food home. He isn't ordering out. He isn't eating all night. I am spending a lot of time in the kitchen preparing healthy meals, packing them for both of us for work, making sure we have healthy Snacks for the kids to eat too... no junk for the kiddoes either... high cholesterol runs in his family, not taking any chances with the girls. He's actually lost 10 pounds in the past couple of weeks and is very excited about it. I'm down almost 10 in that time too....
So... what I needed for success has been the band being at the right place, AND the home being in the right frame of mind. I need absolutely nothing in the house that I can or want to snack on. Even with restriction I'd eat a bowl of ice cream if it was in the house.
Get the junk out of the house. If there are others in the home who really want it, have a chat. They can pig out all they want at school or work or out with friends, but the home is healthy food... and not a lot to snack on healthy or not. Even doing this for a month or two- to get into the swing of it- will help. I know that if I can stick strictly to a diet for a month it's so much easier to say no to the bad foods. I turned down pizza and wings last week at work! from the BEST pizza place in town. No birthday cake either. I know I'm not ready to even have those things in small doses... because I do think I understand now that food is an addiction for some people. I am one of them. I get a taste of chocolate and I'll do what it takes to get more. I would hide it so nobody else could have any. i would eat junk in secret so nobody would see me... if they didn't know it didn't count. Cereal is a HUGE problem for me. Thankfully our girls are strange and hate most cereals so we just don't need them in the house. It makes Breakfast on school days a pain, but it keeps me from ahving 2 bowls of cocoa puffs while watching Grey's Anatomy.
I'm no expert on all of this, but I have lost and gained hundreds of pounds over the past 20 years... ever since I was a 150 lb 5th grader and went to Weight Watcher's camp. I know that food is an addiction. People without this problem can't understand it. Just like I can't understand an alcoholic's need to drink constantly... I don't really care for alcohol much anymore. One or two glasses of wine a month are fine for me. But I accept that some people can't say no to the drink. Can't say no to a bong or crack pipe. I can't say no to my problem foods when they're around. It's how I made it past 300 pounds.
So. If you're feeling frustrated try ridding your home of everything you'd snack on or eat too much of. Others in the home may whine at first, but it actually will be better for them too in the long run! and it doesn't have to be forever... but ask them this. If your husband/wife had a heart attack and you HAD to follow a low sodium/low fat heart healthy diet... you'd do it, right? So why isn't it important enough to support you and your weight loss? The thing you underwent surgery for? I couldn't get him to understand this until he had to change his diet for his health, and he's since apologized for not being as supportive as he thought he was being.
Having my band in a nice spot of restriction has helped. I can't eat very much at one time right now, but having no snacking options has been a Godsend.