I went to the Y today for a work out. I am so stress over some non band related personal issues, I thought it would help. I got to the elipitical and started my workout. There were not too many people around, so I felt ok. Almost as soon as I stated my slow workout, someone came up beside me. He jumped in and zwoosh he was running full tilt on his machine next to me.

Now I support his workout, but it make me seem like a slug to a rabbit LOL. I did step up a bit, but got a cramp and thought I was being STUPID. Someone was walking off a cramp and I could feel them looking at me ech time he passed me. My mind went to the old me "wow she is big, look how slow............you get the idea" . I couldn't do the positive self talk thinking they are saying "good for her exercising, her heart will thank her etc"......

So I cranked up my music and started thinking of my new life ignoring them all. I am 99.9% done with the stuff in my neighborhood and will soon be stressfree. I can not WAIT whew.

I thought of my new friends for the remainder of the 30 minutes. In 2 months I have learned so much about my band and made some new friends. It is cool because they didn't know who I was before the band so much. Sure they know some, but for the most part they are getting to know the real me. The future me and going through the same journey.

They are people who will know the hell you go through when you get the slimming or how much it hurts when you get a fill ( I hate needles). My life is enriched with the new friends I have made and will make in the journey.

Tomorrow I will go back and do some weights. I am excited as I haven't done weights in a year. It is always amazing how strong you feel after you are done. Even if I don't lift much, it is a positive step for me.

I can't WAIT to start seeing some positive results!

Why do people at the gym always have to get on the machine (when theres a whole row empty) next to me?! I had a guy on the treadmill going so hard and intermittently shaking his sweaty hair all over me I wanted to barf but I just switched to a different machine! Well I will hopefully be back home when you are getting your band friday so I will be thinking of you and I'll send you a note saying how I'm doing...if its good! LOL! Cali