Decided I am going to use this as a diary so I can look back on my thoughts and feelings pre-op and post op and hopefully see my progress!! I went into the clinic the other day and I paid the £500 deposit for my lapband. The operation itself is on the 18th april. Im going away on a cruise on the 7th-14th april and I start the milk diet on the same day as my journey home. I was a bit nervous about not doing the whole 10 day diet as recommended by the clinic, but i voiced my fears to the surgeons assistant and he assured me this was only necessary for the very big patients and that i would be ok with only 5 days, i hope to god this is true!!

Ive spent the last few hours reading through various posts/groups/looking at photos on this website and i have to say im absolutely petrified!! There is such a range of success stories!! some people not losing much at all and feeling hungry all the time (which is my main fear as that is the main reason i am getting this operation-to not feel starving all day every day!!) and some people losing loads and saying it has changed their lives. Im just terrified im going to be one of those people that dont lose much or that dont have much restriction, as the thought of spending £7,500 on something that might not even work is heartbreaking!!! plus, im pinning all my hopes on this as i really dont think i could go on much longer living the life i am now, im so unhappy.

Another thing that is worrying me is the fact that no one else seems to have had the operation with the birkdale clinic where i am getting mine done, i dont know if its a good thing or a bad thing that they havent been mentioned. seeing some of the terrible feedback of certain places (the hospital group for example which i thought seemed like a reputable company till i read this website) has scared me cos the birkdale clinic seems like such a good place and everyone seems so genuine, and when i mention things that could go wrong and problems people have (not having any restriction for example) they say it is because the people have not received the aftercare that i will receive. Im just going to have to pray that they are not just saying these things to get the money off me then jib me off once i have had the operation!!

anyway i better go, got to have my blood taken monday and im paying then too so ill have to wait and see if anything changes once they have my money! fingers crossed not!!