The other day the lovely Delarly posed a question for a fun Friday thread -- what are you afriad of.

Well, I'm afriad that I have Cushing's but at the same time I'm afraid I don't have Cushing's. I know that doesn't make sense, but that's where I am. If I don't have it, then I have something even more rare and weird, possibly something call something like "metabolic disorder X..." Oh good.

But if I have Cushing's then what kind do I have? I'm afraid I have a brain tumor. I'm afraid I have some tumor on my adrenal. I'm afraid I have lung cancer. Tumor. That word echos in my brain, in my head, in my very soul. I'm not used to being afraid. I picture myself as more the fearless type, but I cried myself to sleep lastnight.

I'm afraid that if I have Cushing's I'll be part of the 20% that isn't cured. I'm afraid of more surgery. I'm afriad that the recovery will be as awefull as it has been desicribed by some of the folks that have recovered. One woman said that she was in constant pain and it was like she had fybromyalgia. Okay, I had to laugh at that, if the worst of her recovery was feeling like she had fybromalgia, then sign me up. You see, I have fybromalgia.

It it worth walking through fire? I guess the real question is more along the lines of why wouldn't it be worth it to become healthy and have no more symptoms.