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Sing this loud and proud. I hope it makes you smile.

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wendytip

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Lap Band Survival

(Sung to the tune of "I Will Survive")

At first I was afraid.

I was petrified.

But then I got so sick and tired

of my fat butt and thighs.

And I spent oh so many nights

with dreams of skinny size 9 jeans,

and I decided to do something

really special just for me.

And so I’m banded.

I’m on week one.

I live on chicken broth and jello,

but I know this can be done.

I’m gonna tuck in all my shirts.

I’m gonna buy myself a thong.

thought my bikini days were over,

but I’m thinking I was wrong!

And now I’ll go,

to walk a mile or two.

I might even break into a run,

‘cause there’s nothing I can’t do.

I’ll have no more bread or pop,

but I’ll have all those sales to shop,

and I’ll survive.

I will survive.

Hey. Hey

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Lap Band Survival

(Sung to the tune of "I Will Survive")

At first I was afraid.

I was petrified.

But then I got so sick and tired

of my fat butt and thighs.

And I spent oh so many nights

with dreams of skinny size 9 jeans,

and I decided to do something

really special just for me.

And so I’m banded.

I’m on week one.

I live on chicken broth and jello,

but I know this can be done.

I’m gonna tuck in all my shirts.

I’m gonna buy myself a thong.

thought my bikini days were over,

but I’m thinking I was wrong!

And now I’ll go,

to walk a mile or two.

I might even break into a run,

‘cause there’s nothing I can’t do.

I’ll have no more bread or pop,

but I’ll have all those sales to shop,

and I’ll survive.

I will survive.

Hey. Hey

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