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12/5/08

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tonya66

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Well, things are rolling along, I'm doing great, then what happens? Well, I start to sab0tage myself. I go on an eating binge that last approximately 5 days. Man, old habits are hard to break!

 

I will say, since the band, my binges are less frequent, however, the band has not stopped my binge eating. I am not able to binge on as much food pre band, but let me tell you, I can still hold my share of eating. Not that I eat a whole lot, I guess what I do now when I binge eat is eat the wrong stuff. I ate about 2 pieces of Tres Leches cake - yum.

 

I guess I should be happy that all I was able to eat was 2 pieces. Pre band - I would have eaten at least 1/2 the cake. Now, thats not all I ate during my bings, everytime I would eat - I turned to sugar, instead of my good protein. It was a vicious cycle. I don't know what is wrong with me sometimes.

 

But, because of eating the WRONG stuff, the scale has not moved. Also, when I binge eat, I figure, why exercise, so I don't even exercise.

 

Enough of my talk, enough of being down about it, so I got rid of the cake, and headed to the gym last night and I just got back from the gym today. So, I'm over my binge eating for awhile. And over whatever made me snap and go crazy.

 

My question to myself is WHY? Why do I do it? I'm doing so great then all of a sudden somthing snaps inside of me and I go completely CRAZY with food. Why? For the life of me I cannot figure it out.

 

They say people eat because of emotions, but I can't figure out what emotions are causing me to eat. I have a wonderful marriage of 20 years, two beautiful children and my life is for the most part is perfect. Or at least, its perfect for me.

 

My dad was going thru an ordeal, he almost died in November, however, he had two surgeries and pulled thru wonderfully. The binge eating didn't even start until a few weeks AFTER his ordeal. I held myself together and made good food choices when he was going thru his ordeal, so not sure why all of a sudden, when things are good, I go crazy.

 

So, this is something that I must work on. I must be good to myself and quit trying to destroy all the work that I've done to get to my weight.

 

Well, my goal was to weigh 160 by end of the year. In order to do that, I need to lose 2.5 lbs every week until the end of the year. Can I do it? Darn right I will!

 

So I am making a promise to myself that I WILL be good to me. I WILL NOT binge eat. I WILL go to the gym, and I WILL do everything in my power to reach my goal. I deserve it and I'm worth it.

 

Now, how is that for self talk. :thumbup:

 

wt - 167.9

 

exercise - 10:00 am 20 min eliptical HIIT

3:00 pm upper body work out

9:00 pm - 30 min on eliptical

 

Goal for the weekend -

1. stay off the scale

2. eat clean

3. Go to the gym - EVERYDAY!

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Well, things are rolling along, I'm doing great, then what happens? Well, I start to sab0tage myself. I go on an eating binge that last approximately 5 days. Man, old habits are hard to break!

I will say, since the band, my binges are less frequent, however, the band has not stopped my binge eating. I am not able to binge on as much food pre band, but let me tell you, I can still hold my share of eating. Not that I eat a whole lot, I guess what I do now when I binge eat is eat the wrong stuff. I ate about 2 pieces of Tres Leches cake - yum.

I guess I should be happy that all I was able to eat was 2 pieces. Pre band - I would have eaten at least 1/2 the cake. Now, thats not all I ate during my bings, everytime I would eat - I turned to sugar, instead of my good protein. It was a vicious cycle. I don't know what is wrong with me sometimes.

But, because of eating the WRONG stuff, the scale has not moved. Also, when I binge eat, I figure, why exercise, so I don't even exercise.

Enough of my talk, enough of being down about it, so I got rid of the cake, and headed to the gym last night and I just got back from the gym today. So, I'm over my binge eating for awhile. And over whatever made me snap and go crazy.

My question to myself is WHY? Why do I do it? I'm doing so great then all of a sudden somthing snaps inside of me and I go completely CRAZY with food. Why? For the life of me I cannot figure it out.

They say people eat because of emotions, but I can't figure out what emotions are causing me to eat. I have a wonderful marriage of 20 years, two beautiful children and my life is for the most part is perfect. Or at least, its perfect for me.

My dad was going thru an ordeal, he almost died in November, however, he had two surgeries and pulled thru wonderfully. The binge eating didn't even start until a few weeks AFTER his ordeal. I held myself together and made good food choices when he was going thru his ordeal, so not sure why all of a sudden, when things are good, I go crazy.

So, this is something that I must work on. I must be good to myself and quit trying to destroy all the work that I've done to get to my weight.

Well, my goal was to weigh 160 by end of the year. In order to do that, I need to lose 2.5 lbs every week until the end of the year. Can I do it? Darn right I will!

So I am making a promise to myself that I WILL be good to me. I WILL NOT binge eat. I WILL go to the gym, and I WILL do everything in my power to reach my goal. I deserve it and I'm worth it.

Now, how is that for self talk. :thumbup:

wt - 167.9

exercise - 10:00 am 20 min eliptical HIIT

3:00 pm upper body work out

9:00 pm - 30 min on eliptical

Goal for the weekend -

1. stay off the scale

2. eat clean

3. Go to the gym - EVERYDAY!

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...and I WILL be watching you (hee-hee)...accountability to yourself...good job! If we knew the why of binge's it would be so much easier...I think the important part is that you're aware now. Keep up the good work...you're an inspiration!

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Maybe the binge was because your Dad's ordeal was over and you were just joyus that he is doing good. WE and I mean all of us binge for lots of reasons and not alway the same reasons. Glad you are back track. Stick with it and you will do it.

Carol

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Thanks Carol! I am back on track and will stick with it, just got back from a shopping trip and bought a size 8 pair of pants!!! Thats motivation for me to stay on track for sure!

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