For the past 3 nights Ive been dreaming about this whole thing. Like this past time I dreamed that I was about to have it and I had to use the restroom then all of the sudden it took me forever to clean the toilet, there were tons of people crowding the waiting room. Like Im in line at a spa just making another order. So by the time im finally able to use the restroom an announcment comes over calling my name. So I say forget it i need this done, by the time i make it through the crowd Im in my room the doc has cancled me!!! Refuses to do it and reschedule.. Whats this all about? Ive been telling my self every time doubt comes across my mind that I do need this I need it really really bad, Ive bounced up and down up and down with my weight all my life I need a steady point now, I need my career now... Did any one have to keep convinving them selves to keep doing this? Or have weird dreams? I feel like I need to convince my self cause I slip back in to dream world of maybe just maybe Ill lose the weight on my own this time? I know i wont succeed on my own for sure even though i dropped 46 pounds on my own and maintained it a year now but i cant get passes this point grrrrrrrrrr

I went through the same thing at the beginning of the year. My Surgery was scheduled March 7th and I backed out. I convinced myself that I could do it on my own even though I haven't been able to in the past. I had terrible dreams that people were yelling at me calling me a failure because I had the surgery. I even had a dream that I died!! But on Oct 29th I finally made up my mind to take over my head thoughts and go for it. It has been the best decission I have ever made. Is it hard? Is it a huge challenge? YES but you have to remember you only have a tool the rest is up to you and that is what makes it a awesome wonderful challenge. You will love the end results. AND the band gives you a since of power and courage. I love it!

Just trust that God will guide you though your decission.

Cristina

great post cristina!!! You know i backed out of one once also but that was actually the gastric bypass and im glad i did cause then 3 years ago i didnt know about the lap band!!! I needed that im fighting my thoughts also a friend called it a Mind Fu$% you have to fight it..