well it's now around 48 hours after surgery. I can't believe I have done this. I had some effects from the anaesthetic, threw up a couple of times and they got quite worried about that. Had lots of different drugs to stop that plus painkillers pretty much all the time. Felt great yesterday .. the day after surgery. wanted to go home. Was up early .. slept a good 5 hours straight through. Surgeons was late to see me so I stayed in the hospital till 2pm and drove home after (well it was pretty much 24 hrs after the anaesthesia so I figured I was Ok to do that).

Today though .. in lots of pain or maybe it's more discomfort .. really feels like someone's been kicking me in the stomach over and over.

Haven't had much to drink .. an Up & Go and a tiny bit of soup. I am not hungry really at all so that's good.

Feels much harder to get up and about, hurts to do much so I am taking things easy.

Yesterday I had a few tears when I realised the drastic thing I have done to myself.... but then I can't stay this weight and expect to live healthy or for long right?

I am sure once the pain and discomfort goes I'll be fine .. I just have to figure out how to manage this little beast within .. how it works, how it rules my life .. what it loves what it hates ...

It's tough now but I feel in a week or two it should all be good .. I hope!

oh and I put on weight too .. what's the deal there hahah ...man