I just told my boyrfried that we need to be on a break. After posting a thread with my thoughts of my childhood, I realized i have a lot of work to do on myself. I also found myself wondering if I was just with this guy because he loved me before I had the surgery or am i clinging to him because I thought he'd be the only guy who'd ever love me. He also, is like my child. Sometimes i feel like a single parent; more often than not. I pay all the bills and make sure he is doing everything he should be. I can only take care of his stuff to an extent. I am not his mother nor his wife, so certain things i can't do. It always seemed funny to me that those things I couldn't do, never got done. There were just always certain obsitcles that I thought, when they were finished I'd be happy. I have come to realize, that no matter what gets accomplished, i am not happy. i don't know if it him or if its me. I mean, when he's gone, i miss him. i don't if its because i don't want to be alone or if it is him. We have a lot of the same views on life and have a good time with each other just sitting back and debating things. I don't know. i'm so confused. i am only 18 years old and i feel like i'm thirty. Because of the surgery, I had to do an at home program to graduate high school. So since September, I've been working full time. I will be starting college soon and i don't think i can take it. I have money anxiety that comes from my dad and I am so frequently so occupied with worrying about how things are going to be paid for. I need help. i mean he makes money, but he doens't worry about the bills or about the responsibilities that i take on that I shouldn't have to.

I just want to scream, I AM ONLY 18!

TAKE IT FROM ME , YOU NEED A BREAK. I SPOKE TO MY DOCTOR ABOUT MY CONCERNS AFTER THE SUGERY NOW. lOSSING 87 LBS. BIG CHANGES FOR ME.HE STATED I HAD EVALUATE EVERTHING IN MY LIFE. INCLUDING MY RELATIONSHIP. SO MANY CHANGES !!!HE IS SO RIGHT...

Wow! You sound like you are really getting to the root of your issues and taking proactive steps towards growing (as you shrink :tongue2:). Your post sounds very self-aware, and you are doing yourself and you boyfriend a favor by stepping back and taking the time to learn who you are and what you want before you get too committed. If he is really what you want, time away will help you realize this, so don't worry. You should be very proud of yourself.

If your not happy forget about it....He should be taking care of you...to an extent!! You are a new person and about to go into college!!! I am so jealous! I just graduated college this month and I wish to God I would of had the lap band done before I went to college...I had alot of fun and you met sooooooooo many new and exciting people...and boys...but I wish I was in your shoes and had the weight off before I went instead of gaining 55lbs....oh watch out for the college weight gain...it happens to the best of us even though I promised myself it wouldn't happen...it did...there are alot of late night pizza and breakfast eating...and drinkin :tongue2: Just make sure you walk walk walk walk around campus and to class if possible and you will keep the weight off!!! Also, Have lots of fun...it goes by really quickly.