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Pre-LB and Week One

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marie623

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Beginning Weight: 263

Weight to Date: 243

 

 

June 23, 2008. 11am. I walked into the OR which felt like the opening credits to Six Feet Under. Light aqua colored lights that should remind me of the ocean but just borderline sterile. Thank god the people in the OR were funny because that is the last thing I remember.

 

Waking from the anesthesia went smoothly. I thought I would have a bad reaction since I am (was?) a smoker. From recovery I was moved to my private room on the third floor. Drugs are nice. Flowers. Daytime TV. The hospital stay was more pleasant than I thought it would be.

 

Time to go home.

 

I just put a fucking plastic band around my stomach! Am I fucking nutzo!?

 

Quietly freaking myself out, my mother and I make a pit stop at Wild By Nature to get the Whey Protein shake that would take over my diet for the next two weeks. People speaking to me at check out. Cell phone ringing. My mother gossiping about my Aunt. It all sounded like Charlie Brown’s Teacher.

 

My Bed. New Sheets. New Duvet. New Curtains. New Life.

My body was at rest and comfy in my new digs, but my brain had completely vacated my comfort zone.

 

The next week was like no other. Bloat. Passing gas was now a luxury. Drinking a sip of water was like drinking a gallon. To top it off the family was in town. It’s a blessing I live with roommates. But perseverance reared its head, and with all of my supports around me, I did what I needed to do to make myself well. I walked. 20 minutes: Three times a day. I focused on my goal and why I did this, trying to block the depressive thoughts and seeing the light at the end of the tunnel that I have been looking for the past 27 years. But that dark tunnel was so comfortable.

 

My tunnel.

 

It was a Night Club of fun. Smoking. Drinking. A few hits of pot. Indulging in great food. Man its fun. But that was the only fun I knew, or at least wanted to keep around. So the light of new fun is a bit frightening.

 

I am starting school in the fall for a profession completely different than my previous career. Most people don’t know who, what or where they will be in two years. But as of right now I can see and know that mine will be completely different in that time. I have never met that person before. Thin. Healthy. Social Worker. That’s going to be me. See ya later Fat, unhealthy, smoking, Graphic Designer. God, you were so cool :wink: I can only hope Thin Healthy Social Worker will inherit your coolness. I am sure she will. Hey, at least you’ll still have cool glasses :)

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Beginning Weight: 263

Weight to Date: 243

June 23, 2008. 11am. I walked into the OR which felt like the opening credits to Six Feet Under. Light aqua colored lights that should remind me of the ocean but just borderline sterile. Thank god the people in the OR were funny because that is the last thing I remember.

Waking from the anesthesia went smoothly. I thought I would have a bad reaction since I am (was?) a smoker. From recovery I was moved to my private room on the third floor. Drugs are nice. Flowers. Daytime TV. The hospital stay was more pleasant than I thought it would be.

Time to go home.

I just put a fucking plastic band around my stomach! Am I fucking nutzo!?

Quietly freaking myself out, my mother and I make a pit stop at Wild By Nature to get the Whey Protein shake that would take over my diet for the next two weeks. People speaking to me at check out. Cell phone ringing. My mother gossiping about my Aunt. It all sounded like Charlie Brown’s Teacher.

My Bed. New Sheets. New Duvet. New Curtains. New Life.

My body was at rest and comfy in my new digs, but my brain had completely vacated my comfort zone.

The next week was like no other. Bloat. Passing gas was now a luxury. Drinking a sip of water was like drinking a gallon. To top it off the family was in town. It’s a blessing I live with roommates. But perseverance reared its head, and with all of my supports around me, I did what I needed to do to make myself well. I walked. 20 minutes: Three times a day. I focused on my goal and why I did this, trying to block the depressive thoughts and seeing the light at the end of the tunnel that I have been looking for the past 27 years. But that dark tunnel was so comfortable.

My tunnel.

It was a Night Club of fun. Smoking. Drinking. A few hits of pot. Indulging in great food. Man its fun. But that was the only fun I knew, or at least wanted to keep around. So the light of new fun is a bit frightening.

I am starting school in the fall for a profession completely different than my previous career. Most people don’t know who, what or where they will be in two years. But as of right now I can see and know that mine will be completely different in that time. I have never met that person before. Thin. Healthy. Social Worker. That’s going to be me. See ya later Fat, unhealthy, smoking, Graphic Designer. God, you were so cool :) I can only hope Thin Healthy Social Worker will inherit your coolness. I am sure she will. Hey, at least you’ll still have cool glasses :thumbup:

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Wow - one week down already..... How are you feeling?

Your path sounds sort of similar to mine, except that I did the school thing first. I went back to school last year (for Human Resource Management after years of thankless Admin. Asst. work), and should be finished by summer of next year. What made you decide to take the leap from Graphic Designer to Social Worker?

I haven't been banded yet (tentative Aug. 5th), but I'm so nervous and so excited, so feel free to give me pointers on what I may expect that first day/first week. :)

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