I want to eat sweets, as many as I can stand. I don’t want to exercise. I want help, and I don’t know where to get it. I can’t make anyone understand why I want to scream! It’s an effort for me to get up off the floor after exercising, out of chairs, and we won’t talk about going up and down stairs. I have to stop and rest. I just want to lay down and eat cookies. I think about cookies even as I’m eating a meal. I’m freakin’ huge, and I can’t make the stupid physicians’ group understand that I want this band, and no one has any suggestions. And maybe I don’t even want the thing I’m frustrated, angry, depressed, and cookies have been the one thing I could always turn to when I felt like this. What the hell would I do if I got the band and this happened? I read somewhere that people with a “sweet tooth” have less success with the band.

Sweet tooth?! I’m a freakin’ emotional eater! I’m not really motivated, I hate exercising! Yeah, I do it, halfheartedly, and nothing pisses me off more than some well meaning friend or family member saying, “Oh, just do it!” “Well, if I don’t want sweets, I just don’t buy them.” “You just have to make up your mind and do it.”

What a crock!

hi serenity55! i know exactly how you feel....the way you talk about cookies is the way i talk about chocolate and just food in general.

the only thing i could say is that we absolutely have to make a complete change. this band is a life changing experience and to be able to even go through surgery, we have to have a changed mind and forget about our old ways.

we need to stop turning to food for comfort, joy, or any other emotion that we might be feeling.

we cant live to eat....but eat to live.

i've had my band for two weeks now...and althought it is hard and i do get my cravings, i always try to focus my attention on something else.

stepping on the scale and realizing you lost weight is a great accomplishment. and when i think of cookies and chocolate...i just remember my goal weight.. [which is written down several places, like on the refrigerator] oh yeah and remembering the thousands of dollars i invested on this surgery.

good luck to you!!

-Nina

Nina, truer words were never spoken. Thank you so much, because I try to tell myself that I have to change my way of thinking, and sometimes I can do it. As a matter of fact, I feel a little better because I did focus on something else.

thank you again.

Debbie

Hi. I just wanted to comment on how you feel, because what you are feeling is actually an addiction. Now many people do not believe that food is an addiction such as insurance companies, co workers, and even family members, but it is. Society is okay with calling cocaine an addiction, or alcohol, and even sniffing glue. These things are all viewed as "addictions," but my insurance company will NOT pay for my surgery, because it is not considered "medically necessary." They do offer some helpful suggestions on how to "eat healthy." Now let's get honest here. If I were able to take those suggestions, would I weigh 300 lbs? I even thought to myself as I was looking through my benefits booklet, "Let's see here, oh, they pay for people to stay in the hospital to get off drugs. Oh, okay most crack heads I know are pretty skinny. Maybe I'll start doing crack, lose the weight, and then let my insurance pay for me to get off the crack!!!" I mean no one told a crack addict, "Okay, we'll give you some helpful suggestions on how to do a healthy amount of crack." This is discrimination at its best, and I hope someday my insurance company has to shell out millions of dollars in law suits to people who they refused to pay for surgery. I am paying for it myself, but it is WRONG. I feel the same as you about sweets, but my suggestion is to go to a therapist or support group and talk about it. It's not as simple as just suddently "eating 4 to 6 ounces" per meal. You have to understand what triggers you to eat those things, keep a journal, and talk, talk, talk to people who care. This site is FULL of them.

Hope that helps. Don't give up. You can beat this.

Heya Debbie!

I see the cookie monster is calling you. You know it likes to do that. Tempt you, make you believe you can't do without it. But guess what? You can. Please I am not some skinny girl talking about "oh just exercise and watch ur calories" I am 361lbs so I know about food calling me. But sometimes you have to step up and take responsibility for the addiction. What is it they say..the first step is admitting you have a problem? Well you have done that. Now to find out how to deal with it. Find yourself a therapist or nutrionist who will work with you to overcome your addiction. Know that just like any other addiction..when the "high" is gone, you are still left with the problem that originally caused you to turn to your "cookie". Sure it may sound funny, but for the longest time, my comfort food was Little Debbie pinwheels (I think they are called). Chocolatey cake rolled with creme and covered in chocolate. I would make sure to have 2 boxes each time I went grocery shopping. I would even hide them when family or friends came over because I didn't want to share with anyone. I was like Golem from Lord of The Rings..."My Precious" LOL! but I am serious! So what happened? One day I decided this isn't right! Why do I let food tell me what to do? I would sit at work thinking about what I was going to eat that evening. It made me happy, excited even. As if I were going to some cool place or do something special. But no, all I was going to do was go home and eat. It's hard to turn food away. It's a fight I lose alot. But I do win small battles. Remember when I said I weighed 361? Well almost a year ago, I weight 408. Sure it isn't super fast weightloss but hey, it's 10% of the 50-60% I need to lose. So it's a start. I am hoping that learning to curb my appetite will help me should I be approved for the band. I have my fears just like you...Will I fail, Will I be one of those that want the band out now?! But my greater fear is will I be here in a couple of years if I go on living in this size body....

BTW, Every now and then I do have a cookie. But it's only 1 or 2 a month!

Remember it takes 21 days to make or break a habit.

Hope this helps.

Cheryl

Hi,

Thank you for your comments. I was in OA for two years, have been seeing a therapist for who-knows-how long, and sometimes I don’t feel quite as crazy as I did when I wrote this entry. I write all the time, and used to talk a lot more. I have found that unless a person has been where I am, they really don’t get it, so I’ve learned to talk only to those I feel are dealing with the same issues as I am. And you’re right, this site is full of helpful people, and I’m glad I found it.

Boy, do I know I’m addicted! And I’m really sorry your insurance company won’t pay for surgery. Mine wants receipts that prove I tried to lose weight, but the place I went to twenty years ago is no longer in existence. So I get frustrated, angry, depressed, and then hopeful, and start over again.

It’s nice to hear, as I did in the seminar I went to a week ago, that I have an addiction. I heard, or read somewhere that people with a “sweet tooth” don’t do as well with the band. I hope that’s not true. I know it’s not going to be easy, but I’d like to think I have a fighting chance

What will you do about surgery? Will you self pay, or try fighting with your insurance company? I wish you luck whatever happens. .

Thanks again for responding.

Thank you Cherylita. I know that what you say is true, and I also know that there have been times when I could and did beat back the cookie monster. You made me smile when I read how you’d hide things from friends or family because you didn’t want to share. I can so relate to that !

Where are you in the banding process? I really appreciate your words and will be following your progress and wishing you nothing but the best.

Oh, by the way, the thing I was craving as I wrote this entry? Mother’s oatmeal cookies! Haven’t had them in a long time! Didn’t get them this weekend, either! :-)

Good for you that you didn't get that cookie!! SCORE ONE FOR YOU!! I know you can do it!

As for me and my progress, well my Dr says I have an ulcer so I am trying to heal it before I go back to True Results. From what I read, that is one of the reasons they won't do it! But I am not giving up! My Dr is good and she gave me a Prevpac which is supposed to get rid of the bacteria that causes it. So I am hopeful and praying that it is gone by the end of the antibiotics!

Thanks for the support. I am glad ur following my progress this way I don't slip up too much! haha! But as of right now, all my tests are good and I am just waiting to see what happens with the ulcer. Damn the stress!! lol..

Say no the the Cookie Monster even though he is all blue and cute and stuff! hehe

Cherylita