So I realize that I am 2 years post banding but this weekend it dawned on me my banding is not a part-time gig. I know that my learning curve is a bit handicapped because of the events over the past 2 years and I am just now having the time to evaluate and deal with the changes I need to make...granted this is just an excuse again but I can see how I got a bit lost.

I can't take week-ends off or a "band-vacation" I have to make this a full-time life-time commitment. This is the real deal! I know the band is reversable but the whole idea is lifestyle changes for the good!

I have total control of how I do or don't work with my band, glad i'm finally getting the jist of how amazing this tool really is!

I went back and read "The Sucess Habits of Weight-Loss Surgery Patients" By Colleen Cook and she talks about how for Obese people that food is our "drug" that it is a lifetime addiction that we need to deal with.

I FINALLY had my "addicts" enlightenment.... This is the moment where you don't just say "yeah yeah I have a problem" but you say..."I am changing the problem from here on out every day of my life". My brother was a heroin addict and knew for years he had a problem but wasn't ready to say NO then one day he woke up and said NO MORE, through a series of steps he got clean and stays clean. He has been sober for almost a decade but says there is not a morning that doesn't go by where he doesn't wake up and think about drugs...he just has to remind himself of where he is. I finally had my day where I woke up and said NO MORE, I realized I had a problem with food, thus the banding, but didn't really think about the processes I would have to go through mentally to say NO to food and the damage it was doing to my body. Step by step day by day I am making the mental changes to accept my addiction to food and I know that I am my worst enemy and my best friend I just need to respect myself. I am reminding myself each morning of how far I have come.

Rehab no matter what the addiction is not an easy thing...glad I have a support system!

This is something I really need b/c I still don't understand why I do what I do when it comes to food, so the more personal experiences I can read, the better my understanding becomes. I need to get that book!