This morning the office was slow so I had time to reflect on all the things I have happening in my life right now. MAN :tt2: I'm still amazed that I'm going to have this surgery. Well it's not official yet but I am on my way. Yesterday I met with the nutritionist and she gave me some good pointers and I know I will be asking her a lot of questions come post-op. My husband well he's my husband. He's supportive and I know that he just wants to make sure I'm not looking at this with the goal of having a quick fix. I don't want a quick fix I want to work at getting the weight off with just a little extra help. Today I made my appointments for the psych eval. I have to attend one on my own and the second with my hubby. I know this will help him get a better understanding as to why I'm doing this and what to expect as time goes on.

Why am I doing this you may ask? Well other than the obvious I'm just tired. Tired of feeling uncomfortable in social situations because I'm the biggest one there. Tired of feeling like everyone is staring at me when I eat in public because since I'm big I've got to stuff my face. Tired of wearing the same clothes over and over again because I can't bring myself to buy new ones because I'm just going to get bigger and won't be able to wear that size again. I've told my hubby this he just gives me hugs and kisses and says it will be alright. He's trying to be understanding but sometimes you know the only people who truly understand are the one's that are going through the same thing.

I know I'm probably overly dramatic but this was on my mind today. Will this get better...OF COURSE! It will just take time and a little effort on my part and all those awkward feelings will go away. I can't wait to go into Pac Sun and buy a sundress to wear and not feel like I'm wearing a mumu.

Actually that may be a goal for me. When I hit my goal weight/size I'm going to buy a crap load of sundresses and wear them all summer. I'm going to have so many my husband is going to wonder if I have any jeans in my closet. :thumbup: