Well, I have my psych, diet & exerise appointments tomorrow and my ekg/heart thingie on Wedensday and then I should be able to submit to insurance. :biggrin: I'm very excited about all of it. Of course I get nervous about the stories that people haven not only not lost weight but have gained it back and then some. Which I just don't understand.:wink2: How can you gain weight when you can only eat 1/4 cup at a time? Makes me very nervous. I just suppose it's up to the individual but then that makes me worry even more! I've lost and gained HUNDREDS of lbs, why will this be differnt. When I ran my triathelon I was 213 lbs. and had lost 55 lbs. Well, I said I would NEVER gain that weight back. Never say never because here I am. In 5 years I haven't gained it all back but most of it and the very thought of RUNNING 3 miles on a treadmill is freaking me out. I did all of that while not working but now I work full-time with 3 kids [9/7/5] and there is no way I can spend 2 hrs at the gym everyday. Plus I hate to exercise!!! :crying: So, I think I'm with everyone else. I know this is the next step ... but will it work? I worked my ASS off to get from 268 down to 203 and could never break into the 100's. It got to the point that I was burning muscle for energy because I wasn't eating enough! Never say that to a fatty! Then I started to eat more and apparently have never stopped. Sigh. I'm lucky in the sense that my husband of 15 years is very supportive :smile: and is always there for me but he's the go-along-with-the-flow kinda guy and he would NEVER say, hey toots put that twinkie down and go for a bike ride!! Sometimes he's to supportive!!!

Everything that is happening right now is part of the change you are making. I know that sounds strange, but really it is true. Most pre ops go thru this turmoil. What happened yesterday is different than with the band. I was banded in Sept of 07 and have lost 50 lbs. It was not easy. But the band gave me the edge and I have been able to maintain this loss and continue to loss sporatically. I say that because Ive learned that is how my loss occurs. You need to start taking one day at a time. Work on being positive in your mind talk really. Most of what I think about myself negatively is bull and I think if you really look at yourself youll realize that you are doing the very best you can. So don't listen to self defeating mental dialogs. Get on with your next step. Read all you can about being banded and know that food has only one purpose, to feed your body.

:biggrin:

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When I think back to 2002 and how modivated I was [i had back surgery & realized I needed to lose the weight] - I weighed 268 lbs. I came back from the hospital after my surgery and decided I was going to run a thiathelon which had been a life goal. I never in a million years would have thought I would ever be that modivated. I went to the gym 5 days a week for 2 hours and never cheated on my diet for 18 months straight. Even with that I couldn't break the 200's it was soooo frustrating. But I kept my positive attitude and loved feeling healthy and athletic. I would rather be buff and athletic then skinny any day of the week. Paris Hilton, ew!?!? I would rather look like a swimmer or tennis player. But you made me realize something - it was totally my attitude. Every day I kept a journal and when things got rough I began to mandiate myself to writing down 2 things: Why am I doing this? and What do I love about myself today? I am going to start doing that again.

Why am I doing this? Because I want to be proud of my body

What do I love about myself today? I think I'm a great mom.