Aggravating
I posted a really long blog this morning and of course it is not here. I was expressing my fears and concerns regarding my surgery which is in two days. I love this site. I visit often, but sometimes the glitches are enough to make me want to use profanity. I mean damn. Its not easy coming on here to say I'm afraid I may not awake from surgery. I know its a relativley safe procedure. I know this, but I also knowthere is a POSSIBILITY of a problem. I am paranoid I know. I believe that all willbe well,its just that sometimes I let my imagination get the best of me. My baby is five and needs me as a mommy. But that's also one of the reasons why I'm doing this. My highest weight was around 334lb. I amd not quite 5'6". My left ventricle is slightly enlarged and I have kee and hip arthritis and bone spurs. Pretty mild as far as co-morbidities go I know, but I am also bordering on having high blood pressure. I do not want that. Heart disease runs in my family, so the odd so f me living until I'm old old - I mean really old and gray at thie weight are slim to none. So I am going to do what is best for me and my baby and everything is going to be alright. I trust my surgeon, but more importantly, I trust God. Now let's see if this posts.
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