I finally booked my surgery for January 17, 2008. I am anxious to get started. I finally convinced my husband that it is a good idea. I want him to have surgery too. He is seriously thinking about it. He has to have his surgery done in hospital because of sleep apnea and heart problems. He so needs to get himself healthy with me.

I am still eating like there is no tomorrow. I hope I can get started. Maybe when I have to focus on the one week pre-op diet.

Let me see. What things will I not miss about being fat....

• feeling embarassed when I go out in public because I am so overweight
  
• worrying about what to wear to special things I go to like my neice's 30th birthday and another neice's wedding reception
  
• having to shop in fat people stores for bigger and bigger sizes
  
• feeling uncomfortable bending over to put on shoes, cut my toe nails, ...
  
• eating until I am so uncomfortable and bloated I hate myself
  
• getting out of breath climbing stairs, carrying heavy things, dancing, ...
  
• hating having my picture taken
  
• hating wearing a bathing suit or shorts
  
• always hiding my fatness behind clothes, etc.
  
• avoiding the scale
  
• avoiding going to the doctor because of my weight
  
• finding it harder and harder to fit into chairs, rides at Canada's Wonderland, seatbelts, ...
  
• feeling negative about myself because I have no will power to stop eating
  
• dreaming of wearing all the smaller sizes in my closet

• holding on to clothes of all sizes in my closet in case I lose weight so my closet is bulging

I hope this is the miracle I have been wishing for and that I can make it come true. I have to love me again and care about me and how I look.

a month to go til my surgery

if your surgery is not performed in a hospital, then where is it performed? i hope this doesn't appear to be rude or nosey. i am simply curious.