As I begin my 10-day pre-op diet before Lapband Surgery, I find myself thinking, "how did I get to this point?" I mean, it seems like most of the people around can either control what they eat, or can eat whatever they want and not gain weight. Why am I blessed with the ability to gain weight simply by looking at pictures of food, much less shoving it into my mouth?

Throughout my childhood I was always heavy, but never obese. As a little kid I can remember always demanding to be one of the 'shirts' in a game of shirts vs. skins, or refusing to play. I can't remember anyone ever seeing me with my shirt off, except for my mom and my doctor (and neither of those were willingly). I grew up here in the heartland, where most things are available deep-friend and everything goes better with gravy (brown or white, your choice). Skinned knees were healed with cookies, and every major holiday involved seriously large meals -- sometimes more than one.

I graduated high school in the early 90s at roughly 200 pounds. Quite frankly it was hard for me to track my weight after that, as I didn't own a scale that would weigh me. At a physical for a job I took a few years after high school, I weighed 260. In the late 90s at a doctor's appointment I weighed 327. These numbers stick in my head like bits of bad news. Many people remember where they were when Kennedy was killed or when the Space Shuttle exploded -- me, I remember the first time I topped 300 pounds.

In January of 2006, I weighed myself at the health clinic at work and discovered I weighed a whopping 394 pounds. That year I and several co-workers had a weight loss league, and throughout the year I lost a total of 60 pounds. The victory was short-lived; we celebrated my win at Chili's, in fact. Did you know a Triple Play has 2,700 calories? I did, and didn't care. Over the past year I've 80% of the weight back on. My weight losses -- what few I've had -- have always followed this trend. All I can think about when dieting is the reward of a banana split waiting for me after its over. Sometimes, that's the motivation that keeps me going. Sick, I know.

In March of 2007, my wife (who is also blessed with the lovely title of "morbidly obese") had lapband surgury. In the eight months since her surgery, she has lost 133 pounds. This of course piqued my interest. Here I am, starving half the time, exercising and still gaining weight while my wife eats, is full, exercises occasionally and is wasting away. How could I not be interested?

Six weeks ago I attended a Lapband Seminar and I was sold. I've attended all the mandatory meetings (some of which I'll be blogging about as well) and started the pre-op diet. Mentally the surgery seems far off in the distance -- however, seeing as though I'm on the second day of my 10 day diet, logic dictates I'm only 8 days away.

While everything up to this point has been talk, starting the diet is my first 'action' -- it feels like my first real step toward this life changing event. I'm looking forward to it.

My starting pre-op weight is 388lbs, which is more than anyone in the NFL.