Today I joined lapbandtalk.com. I needed to do something. I have been on this journey for a very long time now. I researched gastric bypass, went to a consultation and decided that this was not the surgery for me. The risks are too great. I have a small child and I think it might be best for me to be around. Of course this is the same reason that I investigated gastric bypass to begin with. At that time (5 years ago) my insurance would not cover lapband. Imagine how happy I was last year to find out that that had changed. I went to two different doctor's seminars last year. I decided on the one that would not charge me an outrageous sum of money on top of what the insurance company was paying. I guess if I lived close to the facility I would consider paying the extra $2500 to use the gym for a year, go to support groups,a nd visit with a trainer nutritionist four times, but I don't think its reasonable to drive an hour to the gym three times a week. There are plenty of gyms near where I live that don't charge nearly that much for a year's membership. Besides, the doctor that I chose actually trained the doctor that charges too much.

I have to wait until Nov. 1, 2007 for my psch eval. I had one done last year, but its outdated. I would have done this last year, but I had some unexpected changes in my life and I just could not add that to my already boiling pot.

I went back to start over and found that the insurance companies decided that in order to qualify for the surgery I had to be on a supervised diet for six months prior to attempting to be approved. What a crock. Anyway, I did that, now I'm waiting for my psch appointment. I hope this guy says I'm sane otherwise I think I may go insane - well as insane as I can and still properly take care of my daughter.

So here I am - waiting. I will start doing arm exercises this weekend. My arms are awful. Really fat and flabby. I realize that this will onl get worse after surgery if I don't exercise and maybe even if I do. I'm also worried about my stomach. It used to be so beautiful. I had a c-section and now it hangs. I hope it doesn't look too horrible post surgery, but noone is looking at it now anyway - so what does it really matter?

Here I go.:clap2: Off and running (happily)