This is the second time I'm trying to write a journal entry. The first one was deleted when I clicked on spellcheck. No more spellcheck for me.

Today, my husband told me that he was going to eat out after work, close to his work. That left me to fend for myself. As soon as he told me that, I decided to find a fast food place close to the house and buy something there. I ended up at Long John Silver's. I ordered two fish and its fixings: soda, fries, fritters, and lobster. When I got home, I could only eat half of one piece of the fish. I wonder why I eat fast food as a last resort. I could have come home and cooked for myslef, as I did all week long.

Breakfast: one slice bacon, hot chocolate

Lunch: two center slices sausage pizza, two school-size chocalate milk

Snack: Venti Java Chip decaf Frapaccino

I need to think about why I resort to fast food, instead of healthy choices. This is a sign I ned a fill. Also I need to think about why I let the band do my thinking for me instead of thinking for the band. If I can't eat it, I don't eat it. But if it'll go down, then I eat it.

This is not healthy. I've lost weight because I can't eat much food, not because I've made healthier choices about my food. This is serious and something I need to pray and think about.

Also, I keep saying that I'm going to start exercising at home. I've been doing physical therapy on my back and considering that my exercising. Now that my PT is on hold until after my heart procedures, I don't even do any exercise at all.

I know how you feel. When my husband goes on business trips instead of cooking (even though I have a house full of groceries) I prefer to eat out. I know I can overcome this and so can you. If we have to we can brainstorm together. Stay strong!