Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!
Sign in to follow this  
  • entries
    3
  • comments
    6
  • views
    804

"Optifast" = latin for "Terd No More"

Sign in to follow this  
CanMacDaddy

357 views

Phat Journal Entry;

Starting Weight: 325 lbs (March 10th, 07)

Highest Weight : 340 lbs

Curent Weight : 304 lbs

Banding Date : MARCH 27TH, 2007.... 8 DAYS AWAY!!!

I have lost 21 bls in 10 days of being on Optifast and excercising 30 - 60 mins/d.

THE GOOD:angel: : Lost 21 lbs in 10 days....made it through first 3 days of intense carb hunger!! I am less nervous about surgery after chatting and reading enteries in this bulletin boards. I have decided that the best thing I can do to increase my chances of a positive surgery is to stick to my pre-op diet, remain positive and include the family in all steps.

THE BAD :P: Hello my name is CanadianMacDaddy and I am an addict. I am addicted to Coke. Especially the Zero brand with its great taste, carbonation and sleek black label. I usually have 6 cans/day and have been warned that after banding carbonated beverages may be a NO NO! I quickly felt a stroke coming on as that also meant BEER... I am freaking Canadian and from East Coast... Beer paid my way through university (returned empties) after house parties.

Anyway I am down to 4 cans of crack a day... even worse we just moved to Calgary and 4 houses down there lives a Coca-Cola service technician...Crack Master himself. The temptation is all around!!!

THE UGLY :painkiller: : I have 3 young kids and Dad's quiet time was in the washroom with reading material or laptop. (A laptop in the washroom... is that a bad thing?) Now after being on Optifast I have no reason for the frequent bathroom breaks... "Terd No More" saw dust... so in a frantic search for fibre I have added lots in past few days and things are getting back to normal...well at least once a day regular!

Pre-Op Meal of the Week:

Ingredients:

1 - 10 oz Albertan Filet Mignon (pronounced MIG-NON)

1 strip of Canadian Back Bacon

200 grams of fresh raw mushrooms

5 grams of hot banana peppers

2 large white onions

1/2 bag of McCain's Tator Tots (any flavour)

6 Keith's Bottles of Beer

2 Carrots (for decorative purposes)

2 tbl of Extra Virgin Olive Oil (Extra Virgin...yeah right)

6 large strawberries

1/2 a banana

1 package of Vanilla Optifast

8 cubes of ice

Consume 1 beer. (Do not go to washroom)

Wrap filet with bacon strip. Secure using toothpick as you will need this later. Bring frying pan to high heat with Olive Oil and place filet in pan to sear... count to 9 (for those of you in Ontario just count to 3 three times) and turn over. REPEAT.

Consume 1 Beer. (Do not go to washroom)

Remove filet from pan and cook onions, mushrooms, banana peppers and tots in the remaining cow meat gravy. Add some beer for moisture. Cook for 2 minutes...or for 1 TV commercial period between hockey game.

Consume 1 Beer. (Do not go to washroom)

Cut Carrots length wise and place on plate with potatoes. Place mushrooms, peppers, onions and sauce on filet.

Consume 1 Beer (Do not go to washroom)

Place optifast, strawberries, banana and ice in a blender. Mix and pour into glass.

Consume 1 Beer (Do not go to washroom)

Now take filet with side dishes and throw in garberateur. Drink Optifast and curse any family that may have contributed to metabolic syndrome heredity traits.

Drink last Beer (try not to get any tears in the beer) Use washroom now... laptop optional.

CanadianMacDaddy... wanting to be 1/2 the man I am today !

Sign in to follow this  


2 Comments


Recommended Comments

Phat Journal Entry;

Starting Weight: 325 lbs (March 10th, 07)

Highest Weight : 340 lbs

Curent Weight : 304 lbs

Banding Date : MARCH 27TH, 2007.... 8 DAYS AWAY!!!

I have lost 21 bls in 10 days of being on Optifast and excercising 30 - 60 mins/d.

THE GOOD:angel: : Lost 21 lbs in 10 days....made it through first 3 days of intense carb hunger!! I am less nervous about surgery after chatting and reading enteries in this bulletin boards. I have decided that the best thing I can do to increase my chances of a positive surgery is to stick to my pre-op diet, remain positive and include the family in all steps.

THE BAD :(: Hello my name is CanadianMacDaddy and I am an addict. I am addicted to Coke. Especially the Zero brand with its great taste, carbonation and sleek black label. I usually have 6 cans/day and have been warned that after banding carbonated beverages may be a NO NO! I quickly felt a stroke coming on as that also meant BEER... I am freaking Canadian and from East Coast... Beer paid my way through university (returned empties) after house parties.

Anyway I am down to 4 cans of crack a day... even worse we just moved to Calgary and 4 houses down there lives a Coca-Cola service technician...Crack Master himself. The temptation is all around!!!

THE UGLY :painkiller: : I have 3 young kids and Dad's quiet time was in the washroom with reading material or laptop. (A laptop in the washroom... is that a bad thing?) Now after being on Optifast I have no reason for the frequent bathroom breaks... "Terd No More" saw dust... so in a frantic search for fibre I have added lots in past few days and things are getting back to normal...well at least once a day regular!

Pre-Op Meal of the Week:

Ingredients:

1 - 10 oz Albertan Filet Mignon (pronounced MIG-NON)

1 strip of Canadian Back Bacon

200 grams of fresh raw mushrooms

5 grams of hot banana peppers

2 large white onions

1/2 bag of McCain's Tator Tots (any flavour)

6 Keith's Bottles of Beer

2 Carrots (for decorative purposes)

2 tbl of Extra Virgin Olive Oil (Extra Virgin...yeah right)

6 large strawberries

1/2 a banana

1 package of Vanilla Optifast

8 cubes of ice

Consume 1 beer. (Do not go to washroom)

Wrap filet with bacon strip. Secure using toothpick as you will need this later. Bring frying pan to high heat with Olive Oil and place filet in pan to sear... count to 9 (for those of you in Ontario just count to 3 three times) and turn over. REPEAT.

Consume 1 Beer. (Do not go to washroom)

Remove filet from pan and cook onions, mushrooms, banana peppers and tots in the remaining cow meat gravy. Add some beer for moisture. Cook for 2 minutes...or for 1 TV commercial period between hockey game.

Consume 1 Beer. (Do not go to washroom)

Cut Carrots length wise and place on plate with potatoes. Place mushrooms, peppers, onions and sauce on filet.

Consume 1 Beer (Do not go to washroom)

Place optifast, strawberries, banana and ice in a blender. Mix and pour into glass.

Consume 1 Beer (Do not go to washroom)

Now take filet with side dishes and throw in garberateur. Drink Optifast and curse any family that may have contributed to metabolic syndrome heredity traits.

Drink last Beer (try not to get any tears in the beer) Use washroom now... laptop optional.

CanadianMacDaddy... wanting to be 1/2 the man I am today !

Share this comment


Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

PatchAid Vitamin Patches

×