I read a blog about why we gained weight and got the way we are. I posted on it a comment about looking forward. That has stayed with me and I want to define what do I think is success?

The goal of health, too nebulous to ever know if it was achieved.

Being thin? Probably not realistic at my age, but the forum has given me hope of loosing more than I initially thought I would! Do I want thin? or curvy? or just less physically than I am now?

More energy? Again hard to say when I have arrived.

Happiness? That comes from within.

As I am headed to surgery I have realized if I don't define milestones of success ....I will never be satisfied and my frustration will be more than it needs to be.

There is a good chance I won't recognize the good as I am living it!!!

I have come up with no longer gaining weight. I am not sure what else...

I worry about hydration, eating, recovery, meals, holiday coping, deprivation, not having what I need to succeed, over buying and wasting money on things I don't need, what if, what if, what if....I tend to take on too much at once and then overwhelm myself.

I feel success for me is:

Having made the decision for surgery and moving forward in faith and the knowledge this is the right and correct course for me.

Having a plan for the holidays and how I am going to handle them with the realization this surgery has set me up for focusing on PEOPLE at gatherings, more than the food....or hiding behind the food so I can avoid the people! It is time to learn to love on a new level.

Success is learning to overcome my shyness and social anxiety.

Wearing normal size clothes.

Being able to cross my legs.

Being able to pull my knees into my chest in yoga, and to do a child's pose and feel relaxed.

Using my stand up paddle board STANDING and enjoying it without worrying about people looking at the fat lady in a swim suit.

Fitting in a Medium size uniform next summer on the boat.

Loosing my double chin.

Keeping up with my family on a hike - setting the pace, not slowing the pace!

Wear high heels again to church without my feet killing me off!

Leaning to plan meals in advance and blessing my whole family with the changes in their diets as I get skilled at this.

Celebrating each centimeter lost and using that to show how far I have come. ( I measure monthly and centimeters are smaller than inches so they add up faster! )

Loosing to a healthy weight and STAYING there within the healthy range for the rest of my life.

Having the energy to serve in whatever capacity I am needed or can perceive! And doing it!

Reversing the downhill slide of my health from this moment on.

That is what I have come up with so far.....

I do know the best is yet to be, expect some rough patches, but overall life just gets better and better!