Originally posted on 3/30/2014 Link to original post http://www.bigfatloserblog.com/2014/03/back-to-drawing-board.html

So, a big blow to the morale!

Back in January I got call from Michael at AR Rehab congratulating me for being approved for the Gastric Sleeve through a state program that would pay for my surgery. This came after 2 years of work. Doctors appts, food journals, sleep studies, psych evals, and much much more.

He explained that funds would be available in March, and that I should call him back then to discuss it further. I waited until about the middle of the month to call him, and tried for over a week. He was either out of the office "temporarily" or on the other line, or a myriad of other excuses. Finally last week I received a call back from him and he left me this voicemail. (The name was distorted on purpose)

I was left scratching my head after this voicemail, because it was pretty unclear. "Is he saying that they aren't going to pay for it?" I was unhappy with the voicemail, and so I called him up. I could tell by his tone he was immediately on the defense. I asked him to elaborate what the VM meant.

Michael: "You listened to it didn't you? I said everything in the voicemail"

Me: "Well, yea, but what does it mean that you are re-evaluating spending? Are you saying you are cutting the program."

Michael: "Look Ronnie, I could have just told you no back in January, but I went to bat for you. You are being ungrateful"

Me: "No Sir, I was very grateful when you told me I was approved. I told my entire family, I blogged it, and I have been expecting this surgery ever since. I would have rather you told me no in January than to congratulate me on something that wasn't a done deal."

Michael: "I feel like you are being rude."

Me: "I feel like you lied to me, and my whole family."

Michael: "I can see that this conversation isn't going anywhere, so I am going to let you go and get back to work."

That was all she wrote. I stared at my phone for a minute. I literally felt like I was punched in the gut. My next call was to Blue Cross Blue Shield. I would have to be out of pocket 4 Grand, but I was confident that I would have support to help me get the surgery. I explained that I had a packet put together already with everything they would need to approve me. Doctor's notes, medical records, (about 60 pages of information). The rep said that they would not be able to accept that from me, but instead would have to receive it from each perspective doctor. I explained that it took over 2 years and thousands of dollars to gather this information and I can't afford to go back to the doctors and get the same paperwork I already had. They insisted....

So here I am, back at square one. 400 lbs, and no closer to surgery than I was 2 years ago. So unless I squat and lay a dozen golden eggs, and shell up $16k, I'm starting over. However, I am not going to be stagnant while waiting for this to come together (if it ever does)

The fact is, ever since I learned I was getting the surgery I have let myself go. Red Bulls, fast food, alcohol. All because I thought, what the hell, I'm getting the surgery in 2 months anyhow. NOPE NOPE AND NOPE. I immediately regret that.

Starting tomorrow, I am going to give the Keto Diet a shot. A real shot. It is a little controversial and defies common knowledge of how diets work, but I have seen a lot of success stories revolving around this diet. And, it's gaining popularity among medical community. However, it is expensive. Let face it. Meat, Cheese, and fresh veggies are high. My health is more important though and I need to make sacrifices elsewhere so I can afford it.