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Weight loss, an emotional roller-coaster ride

As most of us know, this weight loss journey takes us on quite the psychological roller coaster ride, starting from how we felt as overweight people (pre-surgery) and straight through to wherever we are now. I'm no exception.

 

I made my original WLS decision back in 2012 because I was extremely depressed, and, quite frankly, felt disgusted (oh yes, disgusted), with the way I looked. My weight affected "every" aspect of my life (work, social, family & marriage). With that said, I was approved by my insurance to have lap band surgery in August 2012.

 

I lost about 90 pounds with the band before I ran into complications mid to end last year, wound up having my band completed un-filled, and was left with the fear (a huge fear, I might add) of possibly gaining the weight back. So, I made the decision of doing a revision to the sleeve, not knowing if I would wind up being self-pay or insurance approved. Thankfully, some how, some way, my insurance covered my surgery even though I only weighed 156 pre-sleeve surgery (not considered obese but still somewhat over-weight).

 

Fast forward to the present: I had my revision surgery Jan 2014 and have since lost about 18 pounds since. I weigh 138 pounds, am considered to be on maintenance, and am a size 8. Amazing, coming from a size 22+.

 

Mind you, I love, love, LOVE clothes shopping now & wearing all these nice outfits. They feel great & fit soooo much better than they did before. So, what's my issue? Is there an issue?

 

The last few days, I've actually been feeling 'fat." Yea, I said 'fat.' I understand I am not fat as defined in the dictionary "(of a person or animal) having a large amount of excess flesh." Nonetheless, I can't explain it. Don't get me wrong, I'd been feeling great about my recent weight loss & finally hitting (and passing) my weight loss goal weight. I can't put my finger on it, but I can't shake this feeling. Hopefully, this is just a temporary feeling. Heck, I'm sure it's temporary. I just don't understand where this is coming from all of a sudden.

 

Anyone else feel this way?



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