It's me again, Your friendly fellow flabster. I was going to wait a while before I posted again. But I keep reading posts about our weigh of life that continue to disturb me.

I think we all need to have a serious chat. I guess I am asking you to have a real "heart to heart" with your one and only true best friend. The only person on earth that knows everything about. Your greatest joys. Your darkest secrets. I am, of course, referring to YOU. You need to sit down and really talk to yourself.

What bothers me so much is the despair that a few of our beefy brethren are experiencing during their journeys to a new life. It kills me to read about or hear about other Bandsters that have not been successful in the most important endeavor of their lives. Yes, you are fighting for YOUR life. You are fighting to become a normal, healthy person. A regular Joe trying to prevent social misjudgments, a plethora of medical problems and the ever hovering black cloud of an early death. So I ask you, what don't you get?

We all have taken the most drastic step a severely "weight challenged" individual can take. Some of us let a doctor put an anti eating contraption in our bodies. Some of us let a doctor slice and dice our digestive tracks. All in the final hope of finding a solution to our lifelong problem of fatness. By having these invasive procedures, we all made a commitment. We committed to our doctors, our families and our friends. But the final and most important commitment needs to be to ourselves. Are you committed to your journey?

We have been give a tool to help us in our quest for thinness. But a tool is all we have been given. And guess what? Tools don't work by themselves. Have you ever seen a hammer bang without an arm pounding it? How about a saw magically sawing by itself. I think not. So how can a Lap-Band or a sleeve or a bypass work without your help? Sure, some types of WLS will automatically make some folks lose weight with no effort. But to be really successful, we need to work our tools. If you wake up from your surgery waiting for the pounds to fly off, you will be greatly disappointed.

Before I said " I DO" to my Lap-Band. I knew this was going to be a lifelong marriage to a better lifestyle. It took a couple visits to the shrink to really get me to wrap my head around what I was getting in to. And I had doubts all the way. I almost pulled out my IV and bolted out of the hospital minutes before my surgery. I am glad I didn't. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself if I did not at least try this last resort.

I learned fast after surgery that If You Don't Work for the Band, the Band Won't Work For You!

So if you're struggling. Take a step back and re-evaluate. Re-commit yourself. If food and drink are your comfort havens, go back to your shrink. And keep going back and talking it out. Ask your doctor to tighten up your band. Spend time with your nutritionist. (I have an intense email relationship with mine! She totally helps me understand how and what to eat.) Get off your butt and do some exercise. I started just walking a 1/2 mile a day. Anything to get me off the couch and away from the evil snacks calling my name. Today I can easily walk a full 18 holes of golf (about 6 miles). I may even try to ride a bike this year!

I was just about the laziest person on earth. I was also the worst eater. I pretty much have never been successful in any weight loss program I have tried before. But here I sit, 10 months out from surgery. Down 75 pounds and only 9 pounds from my original goal. I hate to use a cliche, but this applies here. If I can do it, anyone can do it. You need to start by having that serious chat with yourself. I did.

Much Luck to all!

JT