One of my oldest and dearest friends had VSG surgery on 12/17/13. He has been doing absolutely fabulous. In fact, I am a little jealous at his success because he has trounced me in weight loss. ( He started his pre op diet 12/3 and since that date he has lost 85lbs. I started dieting on my own 8/1 and total, including post op weight loss since 10/21 surgery date, I have lost 75lbs) Ok, granted he is male. And he had a lot more weight to lose. But I have to admit I am jealous as all can be too. I know I should not be. And when we speak I do not mention my stupid, irrational feelings. Yet there is one issue that has me absolutely baffled and even more upset. I am two months ahead of him. I was a guide (of sorts) to him early on. I would share my experiences and thoughts with him as he prepared to journey through things I recently had. But since his surgery we have very little contact. I keep track of him through his weekly Youtube blogs. I can't understand what happened. We had planned to be there and support each other as we did this. We had discussed sharing food as neither of us could eat much, didn't want weeks worth of leftovers, yet wanted to create new recipes for our new lifestyles. I bought him a Yonana machine for his birthday last August, preparing for his coming surgery. In the two months between my surgery and his something happened, but what it was I don't know. Shortly after I had my surgery he sort of disappeared. I was not hearing from him and would have to reach out to him several times before we would actually connect. When he was struggling through the early stages of his pre op diet I tried to be as supportive as I could. I encouraged him and did all I could to be the friend he needed. Then he had his surgery. After that he shut down, at least towards me. During his recovery he was too tired or not feeling well and didn't want to chat. As he healed he continued the distance. He speaks about reconnecting with all his old friends on his video blogs, yet I am being left behind. I am not sure what the reason is. Maybe it is because I am his former fat friend, from his former fat life. Maybe he feels our friendship is toxic for his newfound healthier lifestyle. Yet I have changed too, I am not the fat friend I once was. I am the friend who has been there through many major life events with him. I held his had at his dad's funeral. I held his hand as he went through a fight with cancer. ( and came out of completely in remission) I accepted and supported him when he came out, even as he struggled with his family to accept. We have been through thick and thin together, literally. Yet now, when we were both at a place where support is critical and we are both on the same page....He has gone. Maybe I was expecting too much from him, I don't know. All I know is it really hurts me deeply that he is wanting to move on with his life so entirely while our friendship is being pushed aside. I truly thought both of us having the sleeve surgery would only ingrain our long time friendship that much deeper, but it appears I was wrong. Watching him from the sidelines is becoming hard to do. How do I celebrate my friend's success when it has meant our friendship is suffering?