The problem with a stall is not just the lack of weight loss at a time you expect the weight to be peeling off–although that would be bad enough. The problem with a stall is that it comes with baggage.

All those times when you thought you’d found the “perfect” diet. All those times when there were hundreds of others boasting of their success with something that you were now trying. All those times that you were filled with hope that THIS was the thing that was going to work.

All those times that you failed.

We’ve been stuck at the same weight for 11 days, and it’s very difficult to focus on the now, instead of trying to think of what this means for the future. If I focus on the now, it tells me that my body is changing, my clothes fit differently, and even at 25 lbs, people see and comment on the difference all the time.

If I try to project for the future and imagine that this is the way it will always be, then I focus on the fact that this could be another thing at which others have succeeded, but at which I seem doomed to fail. Which of us has not believed, both before and after the surgery, that we would be the ones who would be the exception to the rule? That we would be that medical marvel that simply could not lose the weight despite doing everything we were told?

That we would be that singular failure while others around us kept posting their amazing before and after pictures?

And that’s the problem with a stall. Even knowing what we do, that every day is a different adventure when sleeved, that recovery, weight loss, and changes happen seemingly overnight, we still believe that this is the time, and we are the one that will fail. A very egocentric world-view if truth be told, but justifiable given our histories.

So if you thought this journey was just about eating your protein and drinking your water and not challenging your sleeve, I’ve got news for you my friend. It’s about battling your inner demons, about having faith in the unknown, and about believing that we are not that special after all.

And in that normalcy and mediocrity is perhaps where salvation lies.

(Follow my journey and my recipes at www.sleevers.wordpress.com)