Ok here we go!! My sugery is two weeks from today and I am starting my own version of the Pre-Op diet!! If anyone has read my previous entries you will know that I decided to start cutting stuff back and out since the day my surgery was booked (April 1, 2013).

For the last two weeks I have been carb free and in dietary ketosis… so this week I have decided to go clear liquids only throughout the day, and one sensible low carb low fat protein rich meal for dinner – it will be chicken or fish with a low carb vegetable. Day 1, 12:24… I am FREAKING HUNGRY!! However, I am going to withstand this physical discomfort because I know that on the flip side, it will be gone.

Why am I torturing myself you may ask? Because I feel that the challenge I will face following my surgery will be as much mental and emotional as it is physical. I want to learn now, over the next 14 days how much protein my body needs, and when, along with the various other nutrient requirements (Multi Vit, Calcium,D, B12).

My resolve is not to feel unwell or weak the first couple of weeks following my surgery, but moreover; to not panic and start climbing the walls because there is nothing solid going into my body.

I hope it works. So far, the gradual decrease has been working for me. I feel physically stable, and mentally empowered. I have lost 18 lbs this year, and 39 since my top weight.

Neither refined sugar nor caffeine call the shots anymore so now I tackle ghrelin – I hope it knows the strong stubborn b***h its up against.

In other news, my sister will now be coming with me to Juarez and I am super excited. She is as silly as me and I think we will have a ball.

My bf/ ex bf?? whatever he is now... has not been home since Monday. We have talked and “made up” so to speak. I don’t believe there was any affair or any of the sort going on... because I know exactly where he stayed (and with whom). However, to get in a snit and not come home or check in for a couple of days after a fight, is extremely childish and disrespectful - especially for a man in his 40s!!!.

My feeling at this point is that he is waiting for me to ask him to come home. That’s not happening. I love the man, but I am far to old for this crap, and I have a wonderful son to think about.

And really, if I can get over Chocolate, I can get over Justin! :Þ