4/22/13 : Time to start a new blog. One without chemo or radiation or surgery :-) It feels like it has been a long time since February 11 but it's not even May yet. Spring has sprung here in the bluegrass and it's such a balm for my spirit. Life abounds! I have been busy living - my strength is back, I'm even doing a bit of morning stretches and more walking. I'm soooo out of shape! I also haven't lost any weight in a few months but I know how to make it happen. I have to stop eating the goodies at night with the kids, unless it's a protein snack. We're planning on driving down to Florida in Julyl to see my family. Need to find a house to rent (with a pool!) that isn't a ridiculous price. I was going to drive down by myself but realized that my husband just couldn't handle the kids on his own for a week. He is 70 and just can't do it anymore. I am 56 and *I* can't do it anymore either! hahahaha oh well, together we manage.

7/26/13 : Right before we were to leave for Florida (what a fabulous 2 weeks!) I had a sonogram from my primary care physician because I had a pain under my right rib cage. He called me that evening and told me I have gallstones for sure but that there was what looks like a lesion on my liver that he was concerned about. I was scheduled for my post-cancer MRI the following Tuesday so I mentioned that to the oncologist. Right after getting the MRI, the oncologist was able to review the results and her verdict is that I have a tumor growing between the top of my liver and my diaphragm (which is why it hurts when I yawn or take a deep breath) and it is in the worst place possible and is inoperable. We both cried a little and she said she would talk with the radiologist about perhaps using targeted radiation to shrink it. So what did I do ? Heck, I went on a 2 week vacation to the gulf side of Florida :-) Had quite the time, although I did slip and fall on my right leg (water + tile = hazard). After the fall, my entire right leg started swelling and it hurt. Didn't stop me from having fun with my family. When I got back home I told the oncologist about it, just in passing, and she ordered a "doppler" (I guess it's just a sonogram) and the vein specialist found that I have massive amounts of blood clots in my right thigh. Now I have to inject myself twice daily with blood thinners (lovenox) and in 5 days start taking cumadin and keep my feet elevated all day long. The doc said I am very fortunate that I am not dead. See ? Cancer is NOT going to kill me... something stupid like a blood clot is going to get me ! hahahaha Anyhow, I have an appointment next Tuesday with the radiologist. We'll see what she can do and if that doesn't work, I will find someone who does know how to remove this "inoperable" tumor. I am fully prepared to die just not right now. God is good all the time.

8/21/13 : The results of the 2^nd opinion I got at the Markey Cancer Center at University of KY yesterday weren’t good. My case was reviewed by a panel of cancer researchers and surgeons (among the best in the country, I hear). The large tumor on my liver is not alone – I have many tumors growing in my abdomen. So, there will be no surgery and no cyber knife radiation. The liver specialist at UK is going to discuss what kind of chemo would work on this type of cancer with my oncologist (he even told me congratulations on having such a rare and aggressive cancer) but that would just be to slow their growth. I’m not sure I am going to do chemo. If I could make this all go away, I would.

I am very thankful I have had all this extra time to get everything in order.