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5 days left! Doubts set in

BigDaddyJoe

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First, the good news - I'm down 4 lbs since yesterday! So strange.

Before pre-op diet, I was 274 lbs on my home scale.

Pre-op diet:

Day 1 - Day 2: UP 1 lb.???? (275 lbs.)

Day 2 - Day 3: Down 1 lb. to original starting weight (274 lbs.)

Day 3-Day 4: Down 4 lbs. (270 lbs.)

 

OK, now the not so good news. I'm having doubts about this whole thing. Doubting myself, thinking "why can't I just do this myself?" It's just that it's all seeming like a huge diet - high-protein, low-carbs, measuring and weighing food. I've had some good success with low-carb diets in the past, only to gain it all back (plus more) when I went off them. Could I lose all this weight on my own if I was strict with my intake, and avoid such a drastic measure? Maybe. But I hope that this will be a tool to help me maintain the weight loss once I get to where I want to be. I know it will be a lot of work, and I'm ok with that. I just hope that it will eventually become second nature, and not always constantly measuring and weighing my food.

But then I see all the success stories here, and read about people who had the exact same doubts I am having. I've seen very few people say they regretted having this surgery. Even the ones who had complications are saying they would do it all over again. That is very reassuring, to know that I'm not all alone.



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Let me tell you a story.... When I started looking into WLS I did it because what I really thought was if I had to do a structured diet for 6 months I would find that I could do this on my own. Well darn it, my isurance didn't require any type of 6 month diet or anything other than 5 years BMI at 40 or more. I knew I would be approved right away for surgery so I gave it one last shot on my own and after 3 months and only losing 10lbs I finally said to myself "F" it, I haven't lost the weight on my own in 23 year and I probably still won't and decided at the point to go through with surgery. My surgeon required a 30 day pre-op diet that is 30 grams of carbs or less and low and behold the weight started dropping off.... it fell off so fast that again I began to think that maybe I could just do it on my own. Thankfully reason again took over but the morning of my surgery I laid there and cried and apoligized to my huband that I couldn't do this on my own.

Fast forward to today.... 9 months out of surgery, 121 lbs lost, 10 lbs from a normal BMI. YES, I'm so glad that I went this route. And, even though I have a small stomach because of the surgery I really do feel like I did it on my own because its still up to me to decide what to put in my small stomach and its me that's busting my butt in the gym everyday. This tool that I have has allowed me to do this on my own and I'm so very grateful!

You can do this too!!

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For me, I had no doubt in my mind that I could lose 100+pounds again...key word AGAIN. I've lost my excess weight countless times before since I was 16.

I didn't get wls because I didn't think I could lose the weight on my own. I made that decision because I didn't want the weight coming back, and with all the things stacked against me as far as weight loss goes I wanted one thing that would help me...a tool. I mean let's face it. We are bombarded by food left and right. It isn't like quitting smoking. You can just go cold turkey and never buy smokes again. You can't just abstain from food ever again. Every day you are forced with a decision. The decision to eat something healthy and normal is easier on some days and harder on others. You are forced with making that decision multiple times a day. I wanted some comfort in knowing that I would have a little help along the way.

My decision wasn't only for myself, but for my 2 year old daughter. I want to be able to be active with her instead of placing her in front of the t.v. because mommy doesn't have enough energy to go out and play. I want to show her how to eat healthy and lead by example.

All in all, doubts are normal. You will have to decide what is right for you and what your reasons are for going through with this. I don't think anyone should ever tell you to get weight loss surgery or don't for that matter...it is only your decision to make.

I guess you just have to think of what you have to lose if you do get the surgery? Maybe 100 pounds...and as others put it...as long as you make that right decision...the weight will fall off pretty effortlessly.

Good luck!

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Thanks for the words of inspiration, karenb4729, and LifetimeLoser. I know this is the right thing for me, just so many things going through my head right now as I approach my surgery date. I've limited the number of people I've told about the surgery, because I didn't want to invite negativity and doubt from other people. The few people I've told have said "you're not that big", and asked questions about what I've done to try to lose weight myself. I regretted telling them at all. They don't know about my medications, all the yo-yo dieting which has made it harder to lose every time, about my sleep apnea which is the second worst my doctor has seen, about my leaky heart valve. I'm not just doing this to look better. I'm doing it so I can be around for my wife and kids.

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BigDaddyJoe, you are doing to do wonderfully well! My sleep apnea has resolved but then again, it was mostly due to the excess weight. I feel like I'm at one of the healthiest points in my life and I'm turning 55 in April - just goes to show that it's never too late.

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Hang in there!! You are going to be SO MUCH HEALTHIER ! I am 7 days post-op.

I chose to tell people but in the next breath I said, And I would appreciate your support." They would back off when I said "I have been researching this more than a year." Funny I know, but people are people.

The waiting is difficult, but there is light at the end which is a New Beginning!!

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