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It's sinking in...

fattyaj

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I've been on the road to seriously getting surgery for 3 months now. However, I first started even contemplating it about 3 years ago. In all this time, the only person I've ever discussed any of this with was my Mom. Not friends, and no other family.

 

Now that my surgery date is almost a week away, still nobody knows.

 

I've been afraid of hearing the judgement of my friends, or having to answer all their questions because they're so curious. I don't want family to know, because they have opinions of things that they know nothing about, and I don't want to hear it from them. I've put in my leave from work, but none of them know--frankly, it's none of their business.

 

Here I am, my Mom's coming into town for 2 weeks, and when she's gone I'll have no one else.

 

How successful can I be with a Mom across the country as the only person to talk to?!



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I just joined this group, and this is only my second post - but I feel that you will get a lot of support from the members here. Even though it's not face to face, you can develop real friendships with people online. In fact, I met my husband of over 15 years online.

I would also recommend talking to your doctor about local support groups - there is likely to be one close to where you live that you could attend on a weekly basis.

Good luck with your surgery and weight loss journey!

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Hi,

You are not alone and like you i have not shared my wls with anyone besides my husband/daughter/ and boss who gave me her word she would not tell anyone. I had my surgery Dec 28 and have lost 26lbs as of yesterday when i stepped on the scale :). I am anxious and nervous about returning to work Monday because i know someone is going to ask me have you lost weight!!! I can see it!!! because i started out as 221lbs. I plan to tell them yes i have and i decided 2013 will be the year i finally take my weight serious and focus on being healthy. I know some ppl will be supportive and their are others that will judge, question, gossip and everything else but be supportive so thats y i have chosen not to tell anyone at work or any of my family members.... I am so happy that i joined this website because you feel support, encouragement, and know that you are not alone we all are here for one reason and that is to become healthy no matter whatever avenue we chose to take the bottom line is if we truly treat our sleeve right it will do what it needs to do and we can be successful with wl for life!!! Im am so excited that i finally had the courage to do something about my weight and it feels extra terrific to see the weight coming off right before your eyes weekly if not daily!!! Blessings to you on your wl journey!!!

TD41

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Aj I told very few people myself before surgery. I did not want to hear any comments good or bad. I am now almost 3 months out...back to work and tell anyone who asks. I felt it was the best choice to say nothing pre- op and I know now it was a smart move. Now when people ask I take the opportunity to educate them. It was also true for me this web site has been a lifesaver... Best Wishes with your surgery aj..... I would just focus on that and your recovery. Trust me the rest will work out...... Take good care! Tina

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Find other VSG patients in your area—either through your pre-op support group or via these forums—and use them as your support group.

I have told absolutely no one at work, only one family member, and one good friend from high school. Next Saturday, a few VSG patients are getting together for a "sleeve friendly lunch" and we're all the way out in the Middle East. One of the other patients and I were sleeved on the same day and were in adjacent rooms.

Use other patients—particularly those at different stages of the post-operative process—for social support. Who else can better understand what you're going through than another patient?

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I live in America and I am from England, I dont know anyone here, so I have nobody to talk to either, and I get on okay, if you believe in what you are doing, and it's whats right for you, have faith in your self.

Having said that, mum's are often a lot of comfort and can be shocking in the things they understand, specially when they see it's something you seriously want/need, think about talking to her, it may help xoxox

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Hello to all, I am new to this website and like most of you I have not told family and most of my friends that I am having wls on March 11th. I am now about 9 weeks away and I do not need negative comments made to me. I know most people are well meaning but I have decided to take my health into my own hands and do something that can turn my life around. I know it will not be easy but it will be worth it in the long run. I am so happy to have found this website and looking forward to share our weight loss journey together.

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