It very well could be. You know those éclairs that the grocery store has - the ones at the bakery? They come in a plastic container w/ about 5 large ones? Ya - they are also tasteless. Well, when I am having a bad day or an emotional one - I find myself at the grocery store - buying them - eating them in the car on the way home - then throwing the box away before going inside – then becoming upset that I ate them all. I have done this about 20+ times in the last 19 years. It wasn't until I was in therapy that I realized it was a connection to my mom. When I was younger, we used to go to a real bakery, and she would share an éclair with me. I guess it was my way of re-connecting with her subconsciously.

Makes sense. Smells & sights bring back memories. Why not foods?

It very well could be. You know those éclairs that the grocery store has - the ones at the bakery? They come in a plastic container w/ about 5 large ones? Ya - they are also tasteless. Well, when I am having a bad day or an emotional one - I find myself at the grocery store - buying them - eating them in the car on the way home - then throwing the box away before going inside – then becoming upset that I ate them all. I have done this about 20+ times in the last 19 years. It wasn't until I was in therapy that I realized it was a connection to my mom. When I was younger, we used to go to a real bakery, and she would share an éclair with me. I guess it was my way of re-connecting with her subconsciously.

That makes total sense to me. My mom and I used to take my Dad to work, and then we'd go to the Dunkn Donuts nearby where he worked and she'd get a coffee and I'd have a donut and milk before she took me to school. I really loved her - and I loved that I had a special connection with her that seemed different than my sister did. Maybe it was because I was so much more needy than my sister was... I don't know.

But bread for sure seems to be my trigger. And I will deal with this in therapy I'm sure.

Thanks for your reply, I appreciate your honesty so much.

I too have had those moments where I eat and then I feel guilty for it. I guess that is sort of the sign of an eating disorder. I never thought of it that much before though.

Good luck to you on your journey!