Here it is the end of month 3. Never thought I would make it this far. Next week I see the surgeon for the 3rd time and he will tell me if I have passed all the tests and can get submitted to insurance.

I waited till the last week to do the heart doctor who because of my age and not able to exercise very well wanted a stress test. I did it and passed. I am glad they did not find anything wrong with my heart.

I went to the psycologist for quite a few visits and I think I had enough of that. She was very nice but I still don't know why I use food as a comfort.

I have been to 4 support group meetings, went to lung doctor and he said I had a touch of asema. My PCD went on to greener fields and I had to get a new PCD. That was not easy for me after many years. I guess I like him as well as any. It is hard to find a good doctor that you can get along with. One week in this 3rd month I had 4 doctor appointments in one week. I changed endo doctors also in month 2.

I pray that I am making the right decision to have this surgery. I know the life I have now is not good. I want a better life. I want to be able to be off of insulin and putting holes all over my body. I am tired of testing and taking insulin. I blame myself for getting diabetes but they tell me it is not my fault. I have been overweight almost all of my life, even as a child. As soon as I started kindergarden I ballooned up to obese and was that way until the 8th grade when I starved myself for 4 months and lost 40 lbs so I could get a dress for graduation. I wanted so to look like the other girls. I managed to lose another 20 lbs over the next 4 years and stayed there with 10 lbs up or down. Then I got married to someone who was overweight and immediately started to gain. I also got pregnant and gained back the 60 lbs which I never could lose. Over the rest of my life I gained another 70lbs and because of the insulin and the pain I have to keep me seditary it will probably continue to rise.

Well this is my weight story. Sorry if I bored you all, but you all mean so much to me. I read every post and blog. I feel your pain and also get joy from your accomplishments. I think we are like a family here. Too all the ones that are doing this at a young age I say GOOD FOR YOU. It is a good idea to get your life back as soon as possible. I have missed so much over all the years because of weight.

Best of luck to everyone. I will let you know what the outcome is with the doctor next month. I hope it is good news.