Slept well, first time since getting home. Got brave and made the twins egg sandwiches....but got tired out fast. Son not listening well...I ended up crying because there isn't one thing he does that doesn't have some grand problem attached to it. He's been sick with a cold since I was in the hospital. Now he has to wear a mask, not touch banisters, clean up more often-particularly in the common areas. What he does is touch everything, not clean his hands, and not listen when I ask for something...like when I called him downstairs to get him out of his room for a change...and I asked him to clean his hands and get the SpongeBob mugs for the hot chocolate....he took so long to do whatever it was he was doing--not what I asked him to do, clearly...that I had to do it myself. It's one thing after another...he's the only one upstairs, and has the whole bathroom to himself...I just wanted him to clean the doorknobs, sinke, toilet, and make sure the tub wasn't trashed so I don't come away from the shower sick or with some kind of infection...did he clean it up? Nope! I was crying because there I was sitting on the hard cedar chest, holding myself up with the metal walking stick that goes to the exercise trampoline--which I never use, anyway. I told him a piece of my mind...because we have been preparing for this for months, and he should know better than to trash the place! He's 14, and I took care of him all these years, through all his surgeries...and last year, he was out of school for 3 months, at which time, I nursed him and did homeschooling so he wouldn't get behind. You'd think that would motivate him to help me by cleaning up afte himself. It's so frustrating. Even with his special needs, there is no excuse for not doing basic things to help me. Needless to say, I was exhausted after waiting around a nd standing there, and yelling at him, and getting emotionally upset and everything...and I took an afternoon nap.

My friend came over to rehearse for the Halloween skits we do for Eckley Miner's Village...and she still has it in her head that I am going to be involved, though I told her over and over that I'm not. I don't even know if I can do the sewing of a few costume pieces...the belly does not like being rubbed...not even by soft nightgown cloth. I might just have to tell her "no" and give her the stuff back altogether. She may get her feelings hurt, but honestly, that's not my problem...I have to take care of me.

Tomorrow I have to drive myself to the hospital for the post-op check up and visit with the nutritionist. It's an hour and a half drive...and I don't want to go. In an effort to prepare for that, I have cut way back on pain meds.

I wish I had help, or family that gave a care about me...that would help me get a ride there and back. At least I have my 14 year old daughter who will go with me and help me get to the office. She can make up her cyberschool classes in the evening or next day. I'll have to try and help her.

I have also lost 2 more pounds, today...if 2lbs a day loss keeps happening...gee, I'll be in my smaller and prettier clothing in no time at all....at least I see that side of things now. The pain is a lot less but not gone. I still have to lift myself up into the back of the recliner after I manage to sit down, and now the one side/arm is loose. I hope it does not break before I'm better enough to climb the stairs every night for bed. The chair has been really comfortable to sleep in, actually, better than my bed. My back hurts now but nothing like it does when I get out of my bed....maybe I'll make the recliner my bed. I cannot get all that protein in. I try and get close, but it's just too much. I do think about eating real food...but then I don't really want any real food either. I've gone back to adding water to my sugar free carnation protein packets...helps it taste better and go down better. I can't wait to ge some bariatric soups or other foods that fit the diet...I'm so sick of these 2-3 things. On the other hand, I am very fortunate not to have some of the problems others seem to have. I hope my restricted stomach does it's job. Gas is an issue, though. Every time I put something in my stomach, I feel the gas pains...still wondering if the "food" is pushing the gas down, stimulating peristalsis, thereby pushing the gas toward the exit sign. I hope so, and that I'm not drinking too fast.

I can hardly believe it's been 10 days since the procedure...seemed like it would never get here and now it's passed. I itch like crazy, so I imagine that soon, this day will seem like years ago, in the not-too-distant future.