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Struggles.

MoreganK

1,143 views

I'm angry. I think at myself. I realized that I could eat everything pretty quickly after I got on solid food again. I baby stepped each time I tried something, taking a bite or two and thats all. I'm 2.5 months out and 52 pounds down. I am ecstatic at that number. But, I've been at that number for 2 weeks, and was stuck at 47 pounds for 3 weeks just before that. I'm beyond frustrated that I'm losing so slowly now... I have 58 more to go to reach my goal. And added to my stress is that my nutrionist thinks I can hit that goal by the end of the year.... now I'm not so sure. I feel like crying because the weight loss is becoming so difficult again, and I think to myself, that PCOS is going to win... I'm forever going to be huge.

Taking a step away from myself, I think that over the last 2 weeks I've taken advantage of being able to eat everything, and I need to work on controlling that. I need to lower the carb intake again, and choose better. I need to resort back to eating like I'm scared of eating something because it could disagree with me. I was terried of bread for weeks, but then... I tried it because I was at a resturant with my boyfriend and ordered a turkey sandwich. Cutting off the crust, I could eat half a sandwich. This felt wrong... I didn't understand how I could eat a half a sandwich. I was full, but not sick and content. Pre-discovery that I could eat bread okay, I would have just eatten the insides of the sandwich. The veggies, meat and cheese, and maybe two bites of fruit on the side. Then... I started being too "normal" again. (Oh, and I still don't eat pasta or rice. I haven't had any for 3 months). I'm a sandwich girl though. I love a turkey or tuna sandwich, and gladly will eat one everyday.

 

Don't think I gorge on stuff. I don't eat sweets and I haven't stepped foot in a fast food resturant in more than 4 months, and the last ones I visited were Subway and Schlozky's. And I don't plan on changing that anytime soon. I'm proud of those changes in who I am. It really is just that I think, for my body, with my PCOS (insulin resistance) I'm eating too many carbs. All that weight loss happened when I was avoiding having any carbs. So, I'm going to focus on getting carbs from just fruit and incidental carbs found naturally in foods like nuts and beans. When we go out, I'll eat the insides of my sandwich and leave the bread behind. I need to just focus on making better decisions.

 

I'm getting my head on right again. I'm kicking bread to the curb, its no longer welcome in my world. I have to do this. I have to lose 58 more pounds and reach my goal weight. HAVE TOO!

 

Below are my before picture and my current picture.... I really wish I saw more of a difference.

 

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hi there

i think you are doing great

your NUT did put pressure on you, telling you could lose 58 lbs by the end of the year, go at your own pace, and don't feel pressured - do how you are doing - which is terrific

i can eat bread, i also love sandwiches, - had one slice once - just didn't feel it was worth it - so i don't have bread anymore

you've been around the block enough to know we all have our stalls - we gotta ride them out

its hard to see a before and after picture - and really see a difference with yourself - but trust me i see the difference and you look great

in my case - i just watched as the numbers on the scale were going down - i never took my measurements, boo hoo - one day i looked in the full mirror after my shower - i stared and said "wheres my stomach?"

as far as being able to eat anything - as long as your doing your protein, measuring your calories and carbs - you know when to stop eating - you can't ask for me

your pictures are great

take care

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Thank you! I think I had an expectation in my head that I was going to keep having this crazy fast weight loss, but my body was actually at the weight I'm currently at for probably 5 -6 years. I stayed at this weight a long time... so my body is comfy here. I think this is part of the issue too. Time to step it up.

i think my NUT was also impressed with how fast that first 47 pounds fell off and gave me that challenge. But, all its done is stress me out and make me angry at myself for being a failure. You're right though. I need to not worry about her. I need to stick to my own goals, which are smaller and feel more obtainable.

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i wrote you a message and it did not send...bummer.

Try to have your shake nearby...even a little that you can sip. I just put some cinnamon in a vanilla one, and it transformed it! I hope I'm allowed to do that...I think I'm not, come to think of it. If you are far enough out, you can try that...it tastes like rice pudding, kind of.

I made my children lots of frozen meals....like a gallon of cooked meatballs that could be gotten out and put into sauce in the crock pot, and precooked noodles that could be heated up...and wala. No cooking for me. They do the clean up, too.

I wonder if something like that would help you.

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My doctor and my NUT both want me to stear clear of shakes at this stage. Liquid calories add up fast and are not as filling now that I'm all healed up.

Precooking would be a good idea, I just never feel like I have the time to do it. Its just me and my boyfriend at home though, and if I ever feel like not cooking, and want an easy night he has no problem with finding something on his own.

I just need to be smarter in what I'm eating right now. I need to remember I'm in the weight loss phase still and not maintenance.

Thank you for your ideas!

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I've got PCOS too, and I'm also insulin resistant and have been off my meds for a few months. Carbs are the enemy! I love my carbs, especially breads too! But we are just not meant to be! You can and will beat it! You're doing great!

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well done on your weight loss so far, you are doing really well.

I havn't had my sleeve yet, still waiting, anyway, i read a post on here that made a lot of sense, she said that if you look at how many cals you were eating to get to the weight you were before the sleeve and look at how many cals you are having now, you have got to loose weight, even if it is slower because there is a big difference.

I have a friend who eats what she wants, but smaller amounts of what everyone else is eating and she has lost the weight and maintaining her weight loss.

Personally i have been looking into carbs because of the change in the thinking with a diet for diabetics, my dnurse told me to have carbs with every meal, but the new thinking is to not have any starchy carbs and have a low carb diet.

I know that i feel better and loose quicker when i cut out the starchy carbs and lower my carb intake.

I am trying to eat now like i will after the sleeve so that once i am onto real food again i will be into the routine.

I also find that if i indulge in carbs, i crave more and am hungrier than when i have mostly protein and green veg.

I think you are on the right track and look forward to hearing how you get on, x

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