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Am I Screwed!?

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~*~ Melissa ~*~

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Alrighty. For some of who who have read my past blogs or posts, you would have found out that I am doing the surgery alone... completely behind my family's back. Not one person in my family knows. My surgery is taking place in Mexico and they believe I'm going to Canada for a wedding. Okay... here goes nothin'

 

My surgery is scheduled for July 19th, returning back home on Monday July 23rd. I am a recent grad, walking in May with my masters degree. If things are going as good as I hope they are, I may be offered a job and will be required to move from Michigan to Tennessee (about a 9 hour drive). I'm not supposed to lift anything for 6 weeks so moving is going to be a blast. As bad as it sounds, I'm planning to "throw out my back"... which may be believable after dealing with the soreness from the surgery. Additionally, training starts the following Monday on the 30th.

 

Am I screwed? I know moving isn't going to be fun but how about training for my new job? Will I be able to sit through training and do what needs to be done after less than 2 weeks post-op???

 

Change the flight is going to cost money. I have no idea when I'm going to be able to get the surgery done again. HELP ME!!

 

I'm a horrible daughter, ain't I?

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I am two weeks out today and have already been back to work, been on a long car ride and I feel great! As for the lifting thing, I have lifted my 45 pound 4 year old on occasion, today in Target being one of them when I was getting him into the cart. I think that you will be fine with work and fine with the drive to Tennessee. Moving will be another story. My biggest obstacle is that I'm still pretty tired, especially when I don't get in all my protein, so I'm still a work in progress.

Your decision not to tell is your decision, period...Obviously you have your reasons. I have not told many people either. My mom and dad know, my husband of course and a couple of my closest girlfriends and that's it. I just could not go through with major surgery like this without sharing it with my mom, she would have been crushed if I did this behind her back, but she is very supportive as is my dad. I have two young sons so I needed their help for the first few days taking care of them as well so I could rest.

Good luck to you on your journey, but I think you will be fine two weeks out to go to work and even make the drive to Tennessee. You just may need some help with moving.

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Moving? EVERYONE needs help with moving! I haven't had it done yet so that's all can say.

Although.....

I couldn't not tell someone. I feel like I get emotional and need to deal with things by talking to others. I admire that you are so strong but I also wonder if you may want to have someone you love involved. This may not happen to you at all but some say their hormones and emotions are all over the place so just be aware of that and decide how that will be handled. I wish you much luck on your journey!

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I think for safety reasons, I don't think its a good idea to not tell someone you love about your surgery. What if something happens or your need help or your have complication. They may be really hurt if they do find out and you didn't tell them.

As for moving, do you have some friends that can help you?

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My best friend knows about the surgery and that's it. He had the surgery done himself with the same doctor and has been my biggest support system. He's even my emergency contact. If I didn't have him, then I would have proceeded with telling my mom. My fear now, if I did decide to tell her, is that I would never hear the end of my poor decision as it is so close to the move date and the new job. Additionally, I am putting my life at risk by getting it done. My family doesn't know because they were not supportive with my decision when I said I wanted to apply through insurance, told me it was an easy way out, degraded me by calling me fat, lazy, etc., and told me that if my sister could lose the weight, that I could.

Maybe if they had treated me better, things would be different. I would hate for them to put me down now for doing the surgery and then 6 months later, turn around and say it was the best decision. Accept me for who I am and the decisions I make now... not later.

Thanks for the advice. My parents will be helping with the move so I do have help. I'll make sure to grab the easier stuff with wheels, so it looks like I'm actually doing something.

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From what I have read, I agree - you will be ok, minus the move. Be very careful and don't do too much. You will definitely have to go with the "back is out" thing. I applaud your tenacity to get this done and I would have done the same thing in your shoes!! I will be having my surgery down in Mexico on the day you are leaving to come home. I will be thinking of you! Best wishes!!

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I hardly told anyone, my husband and my sister . NO ONE else , not even my grown kids. Best decision I ever made. You will be fine. I did leave a letter behind to my family in the event something bad happened so my husband would not get the wrath of everyone I did not tell. You will be fine. I would say do not take the chance and lift heavy things for the time stated by your surgeon. Everyone is different but you could cause a leak. Best to you.

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