i think while being overweight we tend to allow people to "belittle" us. every big person wants to be accepted and looked at as "normal" (whatever that may be). but at some point YOU have to accept yourself! never apologize for who you are!! i originally felt the same way, and over time and with positive people in my life, i realized that if people looked past me because of my weight then it was their loss, not mine! i have yet to have surgery, but instead of having the surgery for happiness(i used to think this was the magic "happiness"), i am having it to be healthy and live a longer life. i have finally accepted that i am a big girl, and the only person that ever held me back was myself! food is an addiction, and obesity is a sickness. you have to forgive yourself for allowing this to happen, but love yourself enough to own up to it and fix it. take one day at a time and keep your chin up and ALWAYS love who you are!

Excellent advice I agree whole heartedly!!!

Reading your post really hits home with me, too. It seems I have always been able to accomplish anything I wanted to EXCEPT for my weight. It has always held me back. I am hoping the sleeve will help me finally find the smart, healthy person on the inside. Good luck with everything... I read your posts often and I hope you are feeling better!

Wow. That is pretty much my story too. I am very accomplished in my occupation and get treated well by everyone who knows me. But I can't help but think they wonder about why I can't get a handle on my body, if anything because they know me as be competent. I do, however, know that I've been passed up for jobs because of my weight, and I have experienced some pretty snotty treatment by people who don't know me and make assumptions based on my weight. While reading this, I realized that I have always worked extra hard and gone above and beyond just to compensate and prove myself despite my weight. In that process, I have been so stressed that I've gained more weight and my health has suffered. What a vicious circle! Hanging on this site while I wait out these last couple weeks has been the best therapy ever. Thanks so much!

Wow I could have written this myself! I have a PhD, I've always thought as myself as beautiful on this inside and out, I just could never get a hold of my weight issue. I think I went on my first diet in 6th grade. Getting this surgery is the BEST thing I have ever done for myself and I would do it 1000 times over. Best $5500 I ever spent

amen sisters! I am in the exact same boat. It's fun to wonder what I would or wouldn't have accomplished in life if I was a "normal" sized person - would I have ever had children even? Everyone, even The Beautiful People, has a burden to bear. Perhaps we are the fortunate ones because ours is easily seen? Or maybe not so fortunate....

I once worked with a woman who was absolutely, drop dead gorgeous AND she was also incredibly kind and sensitive. I got to know her and asked her one day how is it possible to be such an all around great person. From the age of 8 until she was 21 she was covered in patches of psoriasis - she was a walking scab. Miraculously, it cleared up and most of the scars were gone by the time she turned 25.

When we become as beautiful on the outside as we are on the inside, won't it be wonderful when people ask us how we are so kind and sensitve and beautiful too?

Disclaimer: I'm sure there are gorgeous people who are also kind who didn't suffer some calamity :-)