Well I am officially on my way as of today. Scheduled for Lapband revision to VSG on March 7th at Flagler Hospital in St. Augustine, FL with Dr. Robert Marema.

My prior journey was spread over the last six months during which I began to think that perhaps there was something wrong with my Lapband - that it wasn't just all my fault that I had gained back the weight I lost since having my Lapband surgery on 3/6/06. Now mind you, I do not blame the Lapband in total or probably even for most of the failure. I gave up on the whole thing a couple of years ago. I was so frustrated from either being too tight to eat or too loose and hungry to eat everything in sight and more. I was sick of the sliming, food getting stuck, excusing myself in restaurants, and never feeling full for more than 2 hours at a time. I went to multiple surgeons for fills. This past July I went to Dr. Marema who sent me for tests which revealed that the Lapband was not even on my stomach - it had slipped up on my esophagus which explained why food was always getting stuck but once it passed I was wide open as if I didn't have a band. For the first time ever I felt somewhat vindicated. It wasn't just my fault anymore. I have learned a lot of personal lessons and what I believe to be contributors to my failure and which I am absolutely convicted that I won't repeat them again. The past is in the past and it's time to move forward. It's been an emotional and physical at times roller coaster just getting to this point after two appeals, etc. to have this surgery finally deemed 'medically necessary', approved and scheduled - so I'll leave it at that.

So..... drum roll please...... Today's official Pre-Op start and stats:

YIKES!!!! Putting this out for the public to see.... what am I nuts!!! (I'll explain more below).

2/22/2012 - Measurements:

Pre-Op Diet Weight: 286.2 lbs.

Height: 5 1 1/2"

Bust: 53 1/2"

Waist: 49"

Hips: 60"

Thighs - L: 32" R: 32"

Calves - L: 18" R: 18"

Upper Arms - L: 21" R: 21 1/2"

Forearms - L: 12 1/4" R: 13"

Age = 52

I'm attaching some before photos taken first thing this morning. I purposely wore a close-fitting shirt and pulled up the shorts in front to show slightly above my knees for comparison purposes as I lose weight. No smiles there.... but I expect that to change in the future too

The main reason I am putting this out here is specifically related to one of the things I think I did not do well with my Lapband surgery.... which was telling

others about it and facing the facts.

Prior to and just after my Lapband surgery only my husband knew about it. My kids didn't know - my sister who is a Nurse Practitioner didn't know - nor my other siblings nor my mother who lived with me at the time. I told no one at work either - I didn't want them to gossip and I didn't want the 'food police' around. I thought for sure I would lose all this weight and then I would tell them. Well my mother passed away in 2007 without ever knowing and still to this day the people I worked with do not know. I eventually told my kids, siblings and a select few friends. The most I ever lost with the Lapband though was 44 lbs so no one was exactly noticing any dramatic changes since I started at 273 lbs - some certainly did but most people are self absorbed anyway, in my experience. And when you are super morbidly obese 44 lbs is not as noticeable as when you are just obese.

So.... this time it will be different. I've already told several people at work that I'll be having this surgery. My family and friends know also. And now.... so do you....

and so, once again, the journey begins....

Until next time,

Susie