I have my date and its coming up fast!
My surgery day is august 16th 2011. I am currently on the 800 calorie high protein shake diet. Started that on the 2nd of this month and have already lost 6 pounds with that one. My starting weight was 311 pounds in November 2010, and I am currently 266 pounds.
My weight has been all that I have thought about for years now. When I go out with my family I'm always thinking about how everybody is judging me and thinking that I don't fit in with my skinny family. My husband is very thin and so are my three children ages 8, 12, and 16. When I'm at a resturant I think that people are watching me eat, and thinking that I shouldn't be eating that. I feel this way for everything, what I eat, what I wear, where I go, or what I do. My weight is always on my mind. For the longest time I haven't been able to picture myself growing old with my husband, and seeing our children grow up and have families of their own. I bought life insurance a few years ago for fear that I was going to die of my weight and leave my family without my income. Finally my insurance has approved me for the sleevectomy and I see a light at the end of the tunnel and its not death, but life! I'm ready to start living without constantly feeling judged about my weight. I'm ready to fit into my family and not have my kids constantly worried that their mom isn't healthy. I'm ready for my husband to look at me and see the woman that he fell in love with years ago!
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