I feel you. This surgery scares the **** out of me! My biggest fear is that I don't want to die. I haven't yet pin pointed my others other than general worry. I know I want to go through with this because of my health issues and because I know I can lose weight on my own, but I also know that I won't be able to lose as much as I want to to be healthy. I know this won't be easy. I know it won't fix all my problems. Some times I just want to say no, I don't want to do it. But I think, I hope... this will be a good thing. I don't particularly like change, so that part scares me too. But with the 30ish lbs I've lost so far, I feel much better, I know this is something I want to stick with even though I know how hard it will be. Idk if that makes any sense. I just feel that this is the tool I need to get me where I want to be. The good outweighs the bad. Especially when the bad is that I won't be able to eat badly anymore.

I think we all go through feeling like this. I know I am.

Barb, I too had doubts as my surgery got closer. I think some doubts are normal. It is a major life style change, and one that you can't change your mind when you get tired of doing it. A week before my surgery, I started wondering if I was doing the right thing. I have always been fat, and have tried EVERYTHING under the sun to loose weight. I would always loose 40-50 pounds when I joined Weight Watchers (would you believe I joined 17 times!?!) But always gain it back when I got bored with the diet and quit. Usually gained another 5-10 lbs along with the 40-50 I had lost. Also tired Diet Center, Curves, Redux (the miracle diet pill. One of the side effects was supposed to be erotic dreams. I was really bummed when that didn't happen to me, and I didn't even loose that much weight on it!) Also tired Weigh Down Workshop, NutriSystem, Medifast, Optifast, Jenny Craig, Overeaters Annon., Overeaters Victorious, Slim Fast, etc., etc., etc. But now my health is at stake. As I enter my 60's (OMG that sounds old!) I find that I am (was) pre-diabetic, my blood pressure was creeping up, my cholesterol was up (I was on statin meds for that), I had really bad gastric reflux (on meds for that too), sleep apnea (breathing machine at night), bad arthritis (more meds) and the only thing I could see was more medical problems heading my way. I am (I think) a YOUNG 62, and want to live and enjoy my life for years to come yet. So I decided to commit to this and do it! I am bound and determined to get down to a normal weight and stay there. I wrote to a good friend who had a Roux N Y surgery 6-8 years ago, and asked her if she would do it again if she had it to do over. She said "in a heartbeat!" She has really struggled, and gained some of her weight loss back (lost over 120 lbs and gained 40-50 back). But says she is so much more comfortable and healthy now that she wouldn't go back for anything.I think you need to concentrate on one of the last things you said in your post "You ARE worth the effort!" Best of luck. Keep us all posted on how you are doing!