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First day of blogging, Day 9 post-op

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Sarah S

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I'm not sure if anyone will read this, but I don't really care- I need a place to write down and journal my everyday experiences as a new, and ultimately permanent, VSG patient.

 

Day 9 is better. I have felt like myself since about day 5. I've been going to work since Monday, 4 days after surgery. I think this was a smart idea because it keeps me busy and I don't have time to sit around and think about my decision. I have found myself questioning the significance of having this surgery. It is PERMANENT and that is terrifying to me. I can't go back to my old lifestyle. I think and dream about all of my favorite foods that I ultimately cannot fully enjoy anymore. I told my friend the other day that I enjoy eating food and that I enjoy eating A LOT of food. It makes me happy. Unfortunately, I don't have this safety net anymore. I decided somewhere in my mind that being skinny and healthy was more important than enjoying large amounts of food. I am currently having this debate in my head, even though my decision is permanent and I can never go back to eating large quantities ever again. I'm excited about the prospect of eating real food again in a few weeks. I already know the first thing I'm going to have and drool just thinking about it.

 

I feel silly, walking around with only a piece of my stomach left. Like I made some kind of material, superficial decision and abused my body for ridiculous reasons. Could I have lost all the weight on my own? Probably. Would the process have been long, defeating, excruciating, and depressing? Probably. Would I have gained the weight back? Yes, probably, especially since I like food.

 

And now I'm sad because I want to eat something, but can't.

 

At least I can express myself on here. So far I'm not happy with my decision. I pray for my sanity that these feelings change.

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I think in the that way down the road, you will look back at this and have no regrets. This is a perfect forum to vent and get things off of your chest. I pray that be encouraged as you walk down this new road. Keep on posting!!!! You can help others who may be feeling the same way as you but are too afraid to post.:rolleyes:

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I'm all of 3 days post-op and have had a few fleeting thoughts along this line, but the realistic hope of getting the weight off and keeping it off is pulling me through. My partner and I are already starting to think about quality meals that may be more expensive to make, but should also taste wonderful as a reward once I get the surgical ok to eat again. (Got to love Food Network!). Best wishes, and hang in there.

~~Dee

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I am 10 days post op and feel the same way. One minute I think I made a bad decision then the next I feel like the light is brighter than ever in the future. Mixed emotions are hard to control. I didn't know about the 20 staples, the gas and the choking feeling I get everytime I eat. this part really sucks. I feel like my throat is closing up to reject anything I want or need to eat. Water ....Water.... gives me gas. What is that all about? I will pray that we both just stay strong and make it past the babies steps of this process.

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I am 4 days post op and I do miss my favorite foods, but I have not been hungry. It is hard to get all my liquids in. I am still waiting on weight loss and thought I would have has some now but have not. When does weight loss start?

`

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