334 pounds - the most I have ever weighed. I was totally bummed. I have battled the bulge ever since I got out of the Army back in 1987. I was only out of service for 90 days and I put on 50 lbs really fast. It was all down hill from there. I have gained weight and lost weight so many times, I was sick of it. When I first heard of WLS, I thought - no way. I can lose this myself. After all, I had been in the military - I knew what discipline was, right? Yeah, right. Every time I got down to 200 or 205, I would get tired of dieting and gain back the weight plus extra, just in case I found myself in a place where I might starve to death.

One day at work, I ran in to a gal who had an RNY. She was skinny as a rail. I remembered her pre-surgery and at first thought she really looked bad. She finally put a few pounds back on and looked healthy. She admitted to going to an extreme with the weight loss, but even so, she now looked good. I talked to her about the whole process and she said something that stuck with me, "If you could lose the weight, you would have already done so. You can keep telling yourself you can do it on your own or you can own up to the fact that you need a real tool to help you do it once and for all." I mulled that over for quite a while. Then in 2008, I applied to WLS with Kaiser. They rejected me because I did not have enough serious health concerns. Deteriorating knees were not enough of an issue in spite of a BMI of 50. But I was always tired. I went to bed tired and woke up tired. My PCP sent me for a sleep study and it was discovered I had moderate sleep apnea. Ahhh, now I had two serious health issues, so I reapplied for WLS and was accepted. But I had to wait a year before I could even talk to a surgeon, Come on Kaiser, what's up with that???

So - I waited and put the whole thing out of my mind. I put on weight and my knees punished me for that ruthlessly. The pain was getting bad. It was getting harder and harder to stand up after sitting at work for just 30 minutes. I was using my desk and cane to lift myself up. What a trial, but finally - I started the process to have surgery. I did not let myself really think about what was going to happen to me until I met with my surgeon. He explained the procedures I could have to include vertical sleeve gastrectomy. He reminded me the gold standard was the RNY but I could have good weight loss with VSG as well. I chose RNY but thought about it overnight and called him the next day and asked if we could get permission to pursue the VSG instead. I did not care for some of the issues I was seeing with RNY. Kaiser said okay and it was set - I was going to have 80 percent of my stomach removed. No moving intestines around or wrapping my stomach in a band. Easy - piece of cake, right? Again, I pushed it out of my mind, but the night before surgery I started to ask myself what was I about to do to myself? Am I out of my mind?? I'm letting someone I don't know cut away 80% of my stomach - a healthy stomach at that. No ulcers or any other gastric issues. It's a good stomach, been with me 57 years - what am I thinking?? But my knees reminded me of why I was doing this. I was losing my mobility. One knee was bone on bone on one side and the other knee was close to the same. I was in pain when I walked, I didn't want a motorized scooter for Christmas. So, Tuesday morning, off I went to the hospital, putting what was about to happen out of my mind. I have to do, what I have to do.

I wake up and aside from gas pain used to inflate the body cavity, I felt okay and as the day progressed, I realized, I did not feel any different than before the surgery. There was no pain in the surgical sites, my drain was working well, and I did not have a cath - thank you for small favors. I got up pretty quick, sucked down ice chips like they were going out of style and found I had to pee quite often. I finally was able to sit up on my own and would just buzz the nurse to disconnect the monitors. Slept off and on throughout the night as the nurses would check vitals, add stuff to the IVs and so on. I got tired of being in the bed as my butt was going numb. My surgeon came in around noon and said I was doing great and he sent me home with my drain still in place. We did finally talk about my stomach. He said it was long and large. But now, I had a banana for a stomach. It was a size 38. Wow, from long and large to a banana. What a concept, but I didn't feel any different. What does a banana stomach feel like? I soon found out - when told to drink slowly, you drink slowly. I figured that out real quick. I've stuck to my liquids schedule. It's day 5. I feel good though weak. I know from experience with fasting this is typical. I will regain strength as I have full liquids then soft foods.So, I'm kicking back, watching the Steelers losing to the Patriots and enjoying an afterglow after the Broncos finally won again - beating the tar out of the Chiefs - I love it!

So, was I out of my mind to do this? I don't think so. I truly believe I now have a real tool that will finally help me achieve my complete weight loss. The human body is resiliant as is the human spirit and with the help of God, I will do this. I will find healthy weight once again. Thanks for taking time to read this. Thank you Lord, for giving me the courage to do this and I trust that you will be with me each step of the way!