So...they say nothing good in life is easy coming? Well that certainly is the case with trying to make my gastric sleeve surgery a reality. It seems that everytime I get 'just that close' something pulls me back two steps. I started this process months ago, and while procrastination did play a small part, these bumps in the road are getting quite annoying. First, it was necessary for me to get an EGD done - not fun, but not so bad. Then the stress test - no joy in that one. And most recently, the heart catheterization - definitely could have done without that one! Between the procedures and being mercilessly poked while trying to find a 'good vein' (as opposed to a bad one?) I'm feeling a little like I'm fighting a losing battle. Insurance co-pays, deductibles, co-insurance, out-of-pockets - who knew? My head is spinning and my arms and hands look like I ran into Pinhead from Hellraiser.

I want this - need this, to help me in my struggles to lose all this extra baggage and to find "me" again. It seems that I've lost myself in here somewhere under these layers of fatty goodness. My normally confident, funny, easy going self is in hiding. It took several years to lose me, but hopefully it won't take nearly as long to find me again - for good. I'm hoping to get a final clearance for surgery this month so that I can begin my journey back to me.