Written on 17th Feb.2009.

Well here I am again, exploring and trying to seek out other pre-op. GS people. Not much luck. Most people on this site seem to have had the Gastric Bypass and quite happy with it. It difficult to find people who have had the gastric sleeve, or maybe it's just that they don't say which surgery they've had.

Since my last blog. Despite being sooooooo scared, I decided to take a positive attitude to having the surgery. I've been looking into what I will still be able to cook and eat; I've contacted the counseling service at my local hospital to help me get some perspective on the whole thing; I've made an appointment at my primary care centre with our dietician to discuss how my diabetes can be managed after the surgery, worried about low blood sugars; planning to start gentle exercising to see if I can do anything to reduce the amount of sagging skin after weight loss. Trust, this worries me a great deal. Although I hate to look at what I have physically become, losing weight and ending up with excessive saggy skin I think will ensure that I remain covered up at all times. If it's that gross, I'm going to have to seriously consider getting plastic surgery, never thought i'd see the day when i'd think like that.

Today, I made leek and celery soup and had it with a crusty bread roll. Later I had a cheese and Tomatoe in a crusty roll with a nice cup of tea. Will this be bye, bye to such treats? I guess I do have a relationship with food, but I would have regarded this as pretty normal.

How am I feeling now, well, still frightened, apprehensive. I've read on here were people are saying that they have not lost much weight by having the sleeve. To go through something like this and not have it work would be awful.

Anyway, I'm going to be positive in thinking mine will work.