I was asked recently, if I ever would be satisfied with myself. I'm having lipo in a week, where I'm getting a little bit of contouring on the lovehandles and backfat left over from the body lift, and some fat taken from my inner thighs. It won't be drastic by any means, it's just a little bit of shaping, really, but despite telling very few people (non-banders) about it, the resounding feedback seems to be that there's something wrong with me, because I don't seem to be happy with myself.

And yet, I think that's never been further from the truth. I am actually happier with myself than I have ever been in my life. It's because I like myself that I'm not thinking twice about doing this for ME. The difference is, that where I used to think that if I didn't like something, I had to suck it up and suffer, because how I felt wasn't important in the scheme of things, now I don't. I don't like something, I change it. I think I approach things with moderation and I'm not going to end up being nipped and tucked until I look like an alien, so it's not like I have some addiction to plastic surgery, I just want to look as good as I possibly can.

My whole life, I looked after everyone else: my man, my kids, my parents, my friends. I always came last. I was brought up to feel selfish for thinking of myself.

The lapband changed all that. I learned one important lesson in the last 5 years of being banded:

If you love yourself, you will look after yourself, you will make time for yourself, you will make your needs AT LEAST equal to the needs of the people you love. And if you look after yourself, you're being the best person you can be for the people you love too, and more importantly, a good role model for what good self esteem looks like. And if you're not happy with something, change it, because no one will change it for you, and YOU are the only one who can take control of your life.

I'm amazed at how we are constantly told that considering our own needs is a selfish thing to do, and then people wonder why we suffer from low self esteem. Break the cycle. I am not asking you to be a heartless, mean-spirited person to others, I'm asking you to learn to love yourself. It's because I AM satisfied with myself and love myself that I can choose what I want to do to make me happy.