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It's Been Almost A Month

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Tashah

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I was banded on 8/7/2012, I had my first fill on Monday and I’m really not sure how I feel. I have more anxiety than before, I can't sleep well. Physically I’m alright, pain from the surgery is gone but emotionally I'm all over the place. I'm losing weight which is great, it's I guess the reality that one day I will be thin again and maybe that scares me a bit. My friends and family don't really understand why I would feel scared or uncomfortable in my body they all say that I’m ridiculous and give me lines like you’re lucky or your aren’t starving or you have a long way to go, don’t worry so much. In a way all of these statements are true, unfortunately when I’m lying awake a 2am they do not comfort me.

Maybe that is something, food was a comfort to me and now it’s gone. I guess I should find comfort in something else, but what?

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I totally understand you. Many many years ago I lost weight by some crazy diet center and when I hit under 180, I stopped everything and regained and regained. I looked great and felt great but I couldn't handle it. This time around, I was banded 7/30, I am trying to accept the comments about how great I am looking. I no longer take any medications other than vitamins. I fit in clothes that I haven't worn in years and my nephew is getting married in November and I can't wait to maybe fit into a size 14 or 16! That will be a first in over 15 years. My eating was bread, pizza, fried food and ice cream. I am being so perfect, I hope it lasts. I want my grandsons not to have a fat grandmother anymore. Think positive.

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Hang in there. I was told your hormones can do crazy things soon after you get the lapband. I def. believe it, since I'm NOT a crier, and one day I suddenly felt upset at something and started crying my eyes out. It gets better, but I found it so helpful to know that it is very normal to be in a funky place every now and then.

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