Everyone deserves a second/third/fourth+ chance to make the band successful. Having the surgery is not the cure everyone hopes it to be. I am certainly seeing the benefit to the band, I eat less, I cant ( usually) down a full meal when going out etc.

My worst enemy is liquids. When I am having a bad food day, I will go for smoothies and sometimes drink sweet tea:-( I realize that I need to change my ways again and go search deep inside to figure out what the block is.

It seems my block is resistance to change. I am afraid how I will react when I lose the weight. I have been overweight all my life, so thinking of being thin like everyone else, I worry how I will react.

What spurred this? quite possible the cruise weight that came on in November that I can't seem to lose. The stress of having my inlaws visiting for 5 weeks ( my FIL is slowly losing his memory) my son graduating, my daughter turning 16, issues with the hubby, friends losing marriages, heck losing friends.

I have started therapy to deal with all of this in a healthy way. I need to realize that what other people do ( mainly mistakes) do not define ME as a person. I have one the best I can and need to move past the self hate which means I go to my comforts ( food).

I am back in physical therapy and have rejoined the YMCA to get back in the water. High impact exercise causes too many issues at this weight, so I need to rething and recreate a plan just for me.

I am hopeful that some of you may be dealing with the same issues I am. I can help with the newly banded issues, but I am coming back to deal with the what now issues.

ME