About a week ago, my boyfriend and I decided that this is our option and choice, Lap-Band surgery. The path that we will take to better our lives and selves before getting married and having children. I have tried so many ways to lose weight, but what ever small amount I lose, I always gain back, and now I am at my heaviest. I blame myself though and my lack of self control. I was in Japan for the first two months of the year and I went without a vast variety of foods that we take for granted, so when I came home from Japan I ate everything I didn't have for two months. So now I'm 275 pounds, almost pullin 3 bills, and it makes me sick. Tyler says that he is the heaviest that he has ever been, over 300 pounds, but he refuses to exercise, he's lazy that way. He thinks it's all about his portions, and that with Lap-band that will be the jump start he needs. I believe him, I feel like if he knew that he had a helping hand that it would be what he needed. Same for me too.

We are planning on getting the surgery in December (Tyler is going on a 6 month trip to San Diego for work and will be home close to Christmas). We are self-paying so I want to save up as much as we can so that we don't have to finance the whole thing.

My biggest issue right now is that I know for sure this is what we want to do, now I just have to wait 6 months, but it's completely changed my thought process. Now when I'm working out ( I do Crossfit, extreme cardio and weight lifting) it feels so hard and difficult and I find myself saying, "This shouldn't be so hard." And when I am making meal choices for me and Tyler, I sometimes go with the unhealthy choice with the back thought, my life will start anew in December. I need to get out of this mind set. I know that eating healthy and working out I'm not going to lose enough weight to not need the surgery in december, My goal weight is 165. Tyler says his is 200. These I feel are good goal, and obtainable once the surgery is complete. We shall see.