So my order of suger free syrops came and my father was over visting and he draged the box in and he said good god why would you need these how long do you plan to stay on this deit. to my answer the rest of my life you don't go and do a band so i can go back to eating cheese bugers and frise i said i did this becuse it was my last chance i done deits and i can't do them they never work. This is they way i need to live for the rest of my life do you think i would go though sugery to have a band inplanted just so i could go back to doing what i was doing. I said this is not a magic bullit this is my tool it give me some control that i need. To wich my dad repled so you never going to eat five guys again becuse i went in and they have your faviorts the bacon dubble cheese buger and your cherry coke and there firse you know how much you love those firse..

Other freind said this is just one more crazy deit your always doing crazy deits. She said rember the blood type on the Grapefuit one or how about jenny craig or nutrosymtims she said you never succed with crazy deit no way you can succed now

This is my life and you have to get mad to want to change it. One of my freinds who was larger like me we used to joke around about food and make jokes about her weight one day she droped dead of a massive heart attack leaving 4 kids she was just 40 years old. I don't want my family to live with out me I vowed to my self at her furnral that i would do something so my family would not be standing there. I keeped that promice and plan to. So yes i do plan to live like this my whole life

It make me think about the relationships i have it maybe time to change the ones that are not going to work for me now. I know longer can be made to feel better with food. I know that it will not slove any of my problems. Some pepole in my life need to be cut out of my life becuse they liked me better and want to keep me fat this will not work any more