I never thought I would be someone who would Blog. I mean, I enjoy reading other people's and read comments and whatnot, but never imagined I would ever have anything to say that people would want to read. I'm not even sure anyone wants to read this, but I have made a change in myself - physically and emotionally - and I've decided to finally do things for myself. I think that this blog is going to help me stay on track and give me the visual tracking I need to remain on track and finally become the healthy person I want to be.

I've always been overweight. I'm sure this shocks no one. I used to be pretty active though, walking, dancing, working out - but never enough to be really healthy. AND I love food - the more carbs the better! Fresh baked bread, bagels, anything chocolate are my downfall. Again, I know I'm not shocking anyone here. Then I met an amazing man, fell in love and got married. The best thing about my husband, he loves me for me, not my waist size. I lost some weight before our wedding and did a pretty good job of keeping it off. Then I got pregnant. I used this as a vehicle to eat anything and everything I wanted. I gained 65 lbs with my first. I tried losing it, but never got back to my pre-pregnancy weight. And then I was pregnant again. I had visions of being the girl who lost weight while being pregnant because I was going to work out, eat healthy and lose the extra weight I had. This never happened. I gained about 30 more pounds and was able to lose that. So there I was, about 60 pounds heaver than I was before I was first pregnant (about 4 years). I'd never been so upset with myself. I despised looking in the mirror and found that I was starting to hate myself.

I'd heard the commercials on the radio for the lap band and decided to go to a seminar. I liked what I heard and wanted to sign up immediately. I met with the surgeon, did all of the pre-op stuff and am one week post surgery. The pre-op diet was excruciating. I was so hungry, and such a witch! I was really hoping that the hunger would go away after the surgery. It hasn't. I find that I am still very hungry and am so sick of Jello, popsicles, yogurt and broth! I don't want to complain to my husband because I feel that this is something I did to myself. I've lost about 15 pounds since I started the pre-op diet. I guess there's something to only drinking fluids for 17 days.

Another reason I've decided to blog is because I've decided not to tell too many people that I've done this. My husband, mother, brother and sister-in-law know and that's it. I feel that this is something that I've done for myself and don't want to discuss it with anyone. But I know I need support. I think that in this environment, I can ask questions, get honest feedback and not be judged. Thanks for reading and I'm looking forward to blogging about this experience.